Sean's Olympic Figure Skating Preview (With Help From Friends Who Are Figure Skating Fans)

I don't know much about figure skating. Sure, I watched the Nancy Kerrigan-Tonya Harding drama closely in 1994 and I often ask What Would Brian Boitano Do, but I don't follow the sport closely enough to have an informed opinion about any of the 2014 Sochi Olympics competitors. Fortunately, I have two good friends, who we will call Kelly and Marino for their love of the Buffalo Bills and Miami Dolphins respectively, that are as big figure skating fans as they are football fans. This is Kelly & Marino's second appearance on Sean's Ramblings after we discussed whether figure skaters ever got upset at not having the opportunity to win multiple medals like their gymnastics, swimming and track counterparts. Turns out that the International Olympic Committee agreed with me.

Anyway, with the Olympics starting tonight, here is everything you need to know about the figure skating events.

Sean: Despite finishing fourth at the U.S. Championship, Ashley Wagner was one of the three figure skaters selected by U.S. Figure Skating to represent the United States in Sochi. Can you explain this to someone who doesn't understand why the top three skaters didn't make it?

Marino: Basically, there is selection criteria that is used to select the skaters going to the Olympics. Unlike other disciplines, the US Skating Nationals are NOT an Olympic Trials. Therefore, they don't have to place top 3 to automatically qualify. I think Ashley Wagner's far superior international record came into play, in addition to likely pressure by NBC and other sponsors already advertising Ashley as headed to the Olympics.

Sean: So despite finishing third at the US Skating Nationals and ahead of Wagner, Mirai Nagasu, who also finished fourth at the Vancouver Olympics, doesn't get to go to Sochi. If anyone has the right to contact Jeff Gillooly for assistance, it has to be Nagasu, right?

Marino:

Kelly:

Sean: Since neither of you replied to my Nagasu/Jeff Gillooly question, I guess I should change subjects. Gracie Gold won the U.S. figure skating championship. What are her chances of winning in Sochi? In a related question, is Gracie Gold any relation to Tracey Gold of Growing Pains fame?

Kelly: I feel that if the USFSA was going to take the unprecedented step of putting Ashley Wagner on the Olympic Team, then they ought to have replaced that 15 year old who won the silver, NOT Marai. Because if you use the rationale that jumping junior earned her spot, well, then Marai earned her spot, too.

I do think Gracie Gold has a shot at a medal. She'll probably need a little help, but I think that's one of the attractions of figure skating (not so different than NASCAR, eh?)

No clue if there's a connection to Tracey Gold. (Sean's note - I'm going with yes, Gracie Gold is related to Tracey Gold.)

Sean: I don't understand your figure skating/NASCAR comparison. What do you mean by that? Regarding the rest of the women's field, besides Gold, who are favorites to medal? Do you have any personal favorites or women we should root for? Are Katarina Witt or Oksana Baiul still competing?

Marino: Witt and Baiul have been retired for a long time. Please tell me you knew that! (Sean's note: I did!)

Yu-Na Kim is the favorite for the ladies, she won gold at the last Olympics. She is from Korea. It will likely be her, Mao Asada from Japan and either a younger Russian upstart or Caroline Kostner from Italy that will medal. The US has little hope in both Men's and Women's this cycle. The new event is the team one, which is new to this Olympics and will be cool to see. I think it's one competitor or competitors from each discipline (Pairs, Dance, Men's and Women's).

We should root for the US of course! We also like Javier Fernandez from Spain in the Men's event. And I have a soft spot for Kostner, that we call 'falls on head' because she did that at a competition once.

Kelly: It should be a showdown between Yu-Na Kim and Mao Asada for the gold. Yu-Na is trying to overcome a foot injury this season, so it's tough to gauge where she stands against the rest of the field. I do think Gracie Gold has a shot. Falls On Head did not look that strong at Europeans (this nickname was earned because despite falling all over the place, her scores will be upheld by the judges - drives me nuts). Both she and our American "gifted Olympian" Ashley Wagner are reprising their Long Programs from last season. I think this is a good move for Ashley, I don't feel her LP this year was an improvement. But overall I do think this is a bit of a cop out. I'm more excited for the men's event, I think our US Champ Jeremy Abbott can turn the competition on its head. It'll be very interesting to see how former Russian champ Yvgeny Plushenko does after not competing for, like, 4 years. I was a little disappointed with Javier's program choice this year, after having such awesome character pieces, I didn't feel his Mission Impossible (or whatever) show was "Olympic." (BTW, I feel the same way for the Shibutani's - Michael Jackson? In an Olympic year?)

Sean: I'm now rooting for Falls On Head to win the gold. That's an amazing nickname, although since she's from Italy, perhaps we can say it in an Italian accent. She's basically the Greg Louganis of figure skating! By the way, you both now mentioned Caroline Kostner of Italy (that doesn't sound at all Italian) and Javier Fernandez of Spain. Have those countries always competed in figure skating? I always thought the favorites were from Russia (or a former USSR country), the US, Korea, Japan, or Canada. Where are the Canadians?

As for the men's event, who else is representing the USA? Do they have a chance to medal?

Kelly, what is a Shibutani and why is skating to Michael Jackson in an Olympic year a bad thing? Should he perform to t.A.T.u. instead since he's performing in Russia?

Marino, I actually heard about the new team event. This is figure skating's way to have their athletes try to get more medals like gymnastics, right?

Marino: Yes, the team event is similar to gymnastics. Right on Sean! There is a brother/sister team representing us in Ice Dance called the Shibutanis. I am with Kelly that using Michael Jackson in your Olympic year is not a good idea.

You are right about the traditional 'favorites' coming from Canada, the US and the USSR with a few stars from Canada. In the past 10 years, Europe had had more contenders. The advent of the new scoring system helped bring this about.

Sean: Prediction time: Who will win the gold in both the men's and women's events? (I'm not going to ask about the new Ice Capades events.)

Marino: Women's - Yu-Na Kim or Mao Asada. Men's - Too difficult to call

Sean: Marino, I have to say that I'm a little disappointed in your predictions. You gave two options for women's and none for men's.

Marino: Too hard to pick Sean.

Kelly: My picks for Olympic Gold are Mao Asada from Japan and, unfortunately, Yvgeny Plushenko from Russia. However, I will be rooting against the odds for Gracie Gold (probably will need others to falter for her to win, even if she skates her best) and Jeremy Abbott because, yes, I am a homer, and when it comes to international competition, 'murica first.

Sean: I really want Falls on Head to win the gold! (I feel like this was a character in Dancing with Wolves.)

Kelly: I think her time is passed. But as I said before, you never know in figure skating who is going to be the last one standing! And she has proven even when she Falls on Head she can still rack up enough points to do well. I watched some of that NBC Olympic preview last night, I'm excited to watch the Games! Here's hoping they can get thru the event without any B.S. (I bet NY breathed a sigh of relief when the game was done on Sunday.)

Marino: Falls on Head is a sentimental favorite, that's for sure! I don't think Plushenko will smell the podium, if Patrick Chan can skate close to clean, he will win. He is from Oh Canada Sean. I think Mao Asada too like Kelly for Women's.

And go USA! Maybe Jeremy Abbott will surprise and lay it down for the good ole USA!!

Everyone In The Heinz Commercial Is Doing It Wrong

Did you see the Heinz commercial during the Super Bowl? If not, check out the video below (and if so, let the video refresh your memory).



Am I the only one who notices something wrong with the commercial? Everyone in the commercial hits the bottom of the bottle to get the ketchup out. Growing up in Pittsburgh, I learned at a young age the proper way to effectively get ketchup out of a Heinz bottle. You tap the 57. This might have been part of the first grade curriculum. Heinz even writes this on their website!

What's the best way to get Heinz ketchup out of the iconic glass bottle?

To release ketchup faster from the glass bottle, apply a firm tap to the sweet spot on the neck of the bottle— the "57." Only 11% of people know this secret. Now you're "in-the-know."

While Heinz may have spent $4 million on the TV spot, perhaps they should have spent the $0 to tell the marketing people the right way to get ketchup out of the bottle.

Interview with Joshua Comenetz, the Creator of the U.S. Jewish Population by Congressional District Map

Back in December, I shared the fascinating map of the U.S. Jewish population by the 113th Congressional districts. I was so intrigued by this project that I contacted the individual who created the map, Joshua Comenetz, and he was nice enough to answer some questions. If you like maps, geography, population mapping or even the University of Florida Gators, I think you'll enjoy this interview.

First, what is your background and how did you get involved with creating U.S. Jewish Population by Congressional District map?

As a consultant, I do population mapping and demographic studies of both U.S. and foreign areas. I've been doing religious population mapping, mainly Jewish, for nearly 20 years. The congressional district map is a companion to the National Map, a county-level Jewish population map completed in 2012 and also available on the Berman Data Bank website. Both were Berman Summer Research Fellowship projects--fellowships sponsored by the Data Bank.

How does one get to be a population mapping consultant?

I started doing consulting work as a way to have more hands-on work, especially when I was a professor. First I did some redistricting work, but more recently it's mostly been Jewish population. I'm not aware of anyone else who does Jewish population mapping.

How long did it take you to compile the data and create the [U.S. Jewish Population by Congressional District] map?

The project was completed during 2013, as a part-time research project. A revised version of the maps (I received better data for the districts in the NYC area) was just posted online.



Did anything surprise you about the results?

Not that much because I'd already done the county map. It's interesting that the data show at least a few Jews in every district, and how clustered the Jewish population is in some states. The county map shows no Jews in a large fraction of counties, partly because information about Jews in rural areas is sparse.

I was surprised by the amount of Jews that live in the eastern Arizona Congressional district. While I definitely don't want to dispute your results, um, was this correct?

There are definitely inaccuracies in the maps, mainly because of the limitations of the source data. These include out-of-date demographic studies in fast-changing areas, and lack of good data in many rural/small town areas. However, the southeast Arizona district is probably approximately accurate. The Tucson area is split between two districts, including that one. Tucson's Jewish population was estimated at 22,000 in 2002, and a 2006 update of that study found little change. The Jewish institutions in Tucson (according to Google Maps) are clustered in the eastern part of the area, i.e., in the congressional district you mention, and the Census Bureau ancestry/language data also suggest more Jews living in that part of the area. That led me to assign more of the Tucson area Jewish population to the eastern district.

My parents both grew up in small towns, but each of these areas had at least one synagogue. There's not much of a Jewish population in either town today. The reason I mention this is because I'm wondering if there is any comparative data in Jewish population from previous years (with the understanding that Congressional districts change)? If so, are there significant differences between now and 30 or 40 years ago?

As you say, congressional districts change, so it would be hard to compare those numbers over more than a decade. However, county or city data in the American Jewish Year Book goes back to the 1890s for some areas, and you can see long-term patterns of growth and decline.

While you may not be in the prognostication business, where do you see in this map in 20 or 30 years? Any trends you foresee?

In general, Jews move around more than the American average, related to educational and work opportunities and retirement. In growing places, the Jewish population is often growing even faster than the total population. In slow-growth areas, the Jewish population often grows more slowly than the total population, or declines. It seems likely that Jewish population growth will continue in southern and southwestern states, while there will be little change or even decline in much of the midwest. Some northeastern cities will not see growth, but others such as Washington/Baltimore, New York, and Boston will keep growing because of job opportunities and rapid increase in Orthodox communities. Orthodox increase is the key Jewish growth trend of the 21st century.

Finally, I saw that you worked as a Geography Professor at the University of Florida. Are you a fan of the Gators football team, and if so, will they be better in 2014?

I have not followed football, but I was in Florida when UF won the football and basketball championships in the same year. (Sean's note: Essentially, Joshua Comenetz is responsible for the success of the Gators football and basketball teams too! The teams haven't been as good since he left.)

Thanks again to Joshua for taking the time to answer my questions. For more information about the Jewish Maps of the United States by Congressional District, check out the Berman Jewish Databank. You can also check out Joshua's 2012 Jewish map of the United States by county and his website PopulationMapping.com.

Two Questions

It's the Monday after the Super Bowl and Groundhog Day, so I'll keep today's post short and simple.

1. At a major retail store recently, the cashier rang up three items of $5.50 each but didn't charge me for the fourth item even though he thought he did. Before telling you what I did, would you mention this oversight to the cashier?

2. This is a poll/question. If you have lived in the Washington DC area for more than five years, have you been interviewed by someone regarding a security clearance for a friend, neighbor, family member, co-worker, etc.?

Friday Links & Videos

If you're looking for something to pass the time before the Puppy Bowl and Super Bowl, I think you'll enjoy these articles and videos below.

I was asked to share my 12-song mixtape playlist. Enjoy possibly the greatest mixtape ever! [Everybody Loves You]

An oral history of the awesome movie Swingers. And yes I have seen Big Bad Voodoo Daddy in concert a few times. [Grantland]

Josh Noel of the Chicago Tribune visited Pittsburgh and loved it. [Chicago Tribune]

Debbie Gibson celebrated the 25th anniversary of the Electric Youth release. Please remember that the future is Electric Youth! [Billboard]

This may look like a normal hockey fight, but check out Mike Green of the Caps and Erik Karlsson of Ottawa at around the 1:15 mark. Makes you feel good about the world. [Deadspin]



Dejan Kovacevic wrote a nice tribute to the late Curtis Bray who passed away way too young. Bray attended Gateway High School and the University of Pittsburgh and leaves behind a wife and child. [Pittsburgh Tribune Review]

Puppy Bowl Camera! [Animal Planet]

Pittsburgh Sports Daily Bulletin seems to be invading on my Pittsburgh Sports Blogger Interview Series territory by having interviews with Dave Bryan of Steelers Depot, Neal Coolong of Behind The Steel Curtain & Tim Williams of Pirates Prospects. [PSDB]

The end of Steely McGnome. [Steely McGnome]

Finally, Yakkin' With Ya Jagoff! featured an interview with Norman Childs of Eyetique. I babysat for Mr. Childs many, many years ago. [Ya Jagoff]

Found In My Basement: Al Gore's Family

Al Gore invented the internet just for this blog post!

With a second child on the way, we started clearing out the guest bedroom to convert into a kid's room. As part of this clean-up, I came across a box of cards and letters I received over the years.* For 2-3 years in the late 1990s, I received holiday cards from Vice President Al Gore and his family including this card from 1998.

While I'm still not sure how I ended up on this list, I enjoyed receiving these seasons greetings cards. Plus, Al Gore was and still is the most famous person who sent me a happy holiday card.

I wonder if he'll see this post and start sending me holiday cards again.

* Yes, technically I found the cards in the guest bedroom, but they are now in the basement, so I consider this close enough.

Sorry Cleveland Browns Fans

I feel bad for Cleveland Browns fans. I really do. Sure I want the Browns to lose to the Steelers, but the team has been so terrible for so long that you feel for the passionate and devoted fans. This week's Parade cover seems to rub salt in the wounds for Browns fans.* Take a look:

On the left, you'll notice Michael Symon wearing a Browns shirt and the words "Super Bowl Smack-Down" on the top of the page. Meanwhile, Mario Batali has a Seattle Seahawks jersey which looks terrible with orange shorts and Crocs. (Sean on Fashion!) While the Seahawks are in next week's Super Bowl, Cleveland is not. However, if you don't follow football, simply seeing this cover would make you think that the Browns really are in the Super Bowl. Of course, Cleveland has never made the Super Bowl and haven't come close since the Bernie Kosar days.

I think that Parade owes Cleveland Browns fans an apology.

For shame Parade. For shame.


* Does this expression make sense when Epson Salt is designed to help? Actually, you probably aren't supposed to rub Epson Salt on wounds, so nevermind.

Friday Video: Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings

Although I've heard of Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings for years, I don't think that I ever heard one of their songs. While watching VH1 recently, the network showed a video for their latest song, Stranger to My Happiness. I like the sound.

My Trip To The Podiatrist

Before Monday, I had never been to a podiatrist. I'm not going to share the reason why I went or what happened because it is not very pleasant particularly if you're squeamish. Well, I can confirm that I did not have a foot amputated and did not start growing extra toes. Therefore, you cannot call me Sixto Lezcano.

Anyway, since I haven't written anything in nearly a week, I felt the need to share some notes about the appointment.

When the doctor recommended getting a procedure done in the office that day, the assistant asked me if I wanted a divider so I wouldn't see what was happening. Since I wasn't having a C-section, I declined though I did ask for a magazine. She returned with two choices, a golf magazine and a runners magazine. I chose the runners magazine since the woman on the cover was more attractive than Phil Mickelson.

Runner's World (I think that was the magazine's name) included a profile of a female teacher in her 20s who is in the Guinness Book of World Records for being the youngest person to run the most marathons. The article didn't mention that she is too busy running to create adequate lesson plans for her students.

After the doctor completed the procedure, he said that I shouldn't go to the gym that evening. No concerns on that one. Then he clarified that I could still go to the gym, but that I shouldn't do any running. I guess he thought I was a runner since I was reading Runner's World.

Several days later, I'm walking around with a bit of a limp. I've been referring to myself as 50 Cent since I thought "In Da Club" included a line that he walks with a limp. I discovered that the actual line is "Been hit wit a few shells but I don't walk wit a limp." You learn something every day!

Meanwhile, perhaps I'll start to refer to myself as Martin Crane.

Friday Videos

Happy Friday! Today, we have not one, not two, not four, but three videos for you! The first is the talented chorus at PS22 Elementary School in Staten Island teaming up with Ithacappella to perform OneRepublic's Counting Stars.



Next, your may remember Susie Meister of MTV's Road Rules and many of the Real World/Road Rules challenge shows. Did you also know that she's earning a doctorate in Religious Studies at the University of Pittsburgh? Meister was part of a recent “Yakkin’ With Ya Jagoff!” She's a Pittsburgh megastar!



I generally watch handball for about 20 minutes every four years during the summer Olympics. Well, I can now say that I watched handball during a non-Summer Olympics year. Can someone explain the physics of this shot? (h/t Deadspin)



This has to be the only blog that has one post about Susie Meister, handball and an acappella/elementary school chorus.

Where Can You Find Cherikee Red?

As a child, I often went to Rhoda's in Squirrel Hill with my aunt and uncle and had matzah ball soup, a hot dog or sandwich and a can of Cherikee Red pop (yes, I said pop). I'm not sure how well these items went together, but I really enjoyed these meals. Anyway, if you're not familiar with Cherikee Red, you're missing out on this cherry pop magical deliciousness. I haven't seen Cherikee Red in years, so I turned to the internet* to see if the product still exists.

Last February, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette published an article by Andrew Seder (why is the writer different than all other writers?) titled "Cherikee Red: Rediscovered Soft Drink From Scranton Makes Comeback But Still Is Scarce." Essentially, Cherikee Red's back. All right! However, where can you find this refreshing and probably low-calorie soft drink? There's a Bring Back Cherikee Red Facebook group that shows some businesses that carry Cherikee Red, but this page hasn't been updated in nearly a year. More importantly, I don't see the product carried anywhere outside Pennsylvania.

Here's my challenge to you. If you see Cherikee Red, post a comment here about where you found it. Bonus points if you see Cherikee Red anywhere in the DC area. Maybe I should ask my local Wegmans to carry Cherikee Red.

As a bit of a tangent, the Washington Redskins should really sell Cherikee Red at FedEx Field. Seems like a perfect match.


* Where I quickly discovered that Cherikee Red is Cherikee Red and not Cherokee Red if that makes sense.

Not Lost In Translation

This is a blog post I plan on sharing with my son in about five years. And then maybe again during his wedding. My son is only two years old, and clearly, he has not mastered the English language. (Of course, if you're reading this blog, you discovered that I have not mastered the English language either.)

Here are some of my favorite words my son uses and their definitions:

Lala = Banana

Hot sauce = Apple sauce. To my knowledge, GoGo Squeez does not make a Tabasco-flavored apple sauce.

Zeba = Zebra

Cheetos = Cheerios. Just wait until he discovers Cheetos and that they are a must tastier snack.

Dinotaur = Dinosaur

Bollypop = Lollipop. Maybe my son watches Indian movies at school.

For the letter H, my son says the name of a former teacher with a first name that starts with H. While it is still cute, I really hope he starts saying H by kindergarten.

Chips = Chips, pretzels, popcorn or any other salty snack.

Cake = Cookies, chocolate, muffins or any other sweet snack.

Daddy's bus = Bus. Every bus is Daddy's bus. You didn't know that I own the Blue Bird bus manufacturing company, did you?

State Of The Ramblings

Wednesday marked the 9th anniversary (yes 9th!) of Sean's Ramblings, so it's time for my annual State of the Ramblings. Although I had fewer posts in 2013 compared to any other year of this blog, I still averaged slightly more than a blog post every other day. Not too shabby.

(Get it? For 9 years of Sean's Ramblings.)

A big part of this blog over the past year was community. I got more involved with the Pittsburgh blogger community by participating in a Pittsburgh Guest Blogger event, becoming the Commissioner of the Pittsburgh Blogger fantasy football league, and I was encouraged to do NaBloPoMo in November from some Pittsburgh bloggers. Meanwhile, while I didn't hold the Best Pittsburgh Sports Blog tournament this year, the Pittsburgh Sports Blogger Interview Series was fun and something that I'm proud of. I plan on continuing the series in 2013. Meanwhile, I attended my first ever Northern Virginia blogger event (since I don't actually live in Pittsburgh anymore), and I questioned if the DC blogging community is dead.

Fatherhood posts continue to be a big part of my blog and with a second child on the way (let's call the baby Jim Paek or Jack Wilson for #2), there's a good chance that there will be more fatherhood posts in 2014. Of course, with a second child there may be fewer posts in 2014 since I expect to be a little busy and a lot tired.

2013 was the year of famous visitors. Sally Wiggin, Edgar Snyder, John Ross Bowie (aka Kripke on The Big Bang Theory) and at least one of The Birthday Boys all read a post on Sean's Ramblings. This was confirmed based on Twitter correspondence. Unconfirmed visitors to my blog last year included President Obama, Mike Tomlin, Mila Kunis and Kevin Pittsnogle's mom.

On a completely different topic, these are some of my favorite blog posts of 2013:

Paul McCartney Concert Review
Return to Pittsburgh
Hockey Road Trip

So what will 2014 bring? Besides fatherhood posts, I hope to have entertaining posts about the Olympics and World Cup. I also hope to write all about winning my fantasy baseball league for the first time in the 20+ years I have been in the league.

I'm also contemplating making Sean's Ramblings its own site instead of using the Blogspot address. However, I want to make sure that I keep my archives and I don't really want to pay for a domain. Plus, I feel like making a new site could be a lot of work. Basically, I probably won't do anything about this.

Finally, I want to thank you for reading and for commenting over the past year and past 9 years. I really appreciate your support, feedback and encouragement!

You Know How I Know You're Gay? You Like Coldplay

Monday's Washington Post included a story that The Advocate named Washington D.C. the gayest city in America. Among the criteria to select the gayest cities in America, The Advocate looked at such things as lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender elected officials; bars on Out magazine’s list of the 200 greatest gay bars in the world (the Duplex Diner and JR’s both showed up on that list); and concerts performed by Mariah Carey, Pink, Lady Gaga or the Jonas Brothers.

I'm a little confused by the last sentence. How does concerts performed by Mariah Carey, Pink, Lady Gaga and the Jonas Brothers make a city more gay than other cities? When Lady Gaga organizes an American tour, she goes to big cities with arenas. Basically, she's not going to play shows in Punxsutawney, Paducah, or Poughkeepsie even though they could be just as gay as the cities that made the list like DC, San Francisco and Atlanta. Besides, wouldn't a bigger indicator of a gay city be concerts performed by Elton John, Melissa Etheridge, The Indigo Girls or Right Said Fred?



Should I have posted the video for Come to My Window instead?

Pittsburgh Pirates Hat Goes To North Korea

Dennis Rodman is returning to North Korea and is bringing former NBA players with him. According to the AP story, Rodman's squad — featuring ex-All Stars Kenny Anderson, Cliff Robinson and Vin Baker — will play against a team of North Koreans on Wednesday, which is believed to be Kim's birthday. The former NBA players, who arrived in Pyongyang on Monday, also include Eric "Sleepy" Floyd, guard Doug Christie and Charles D. Smith, who played for the New York Knicks. Craig Hodges and four streetball players are also on Rodman's roster.

Deadspin included a picture or Rodman's team (at an airport?), and the guy on the left is wearing a Pittsburgh Pirates hat.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure of the identity of this individual wearing the Pirates hat along with the very stylish pink pants and purse. Charles Smith has ties to Pittsburgh from his time at the University of Pittsburgh, but that's definitely not Smith.

Regardless, is this the first time a Pittsburgh Pirates hat has traveled to North Korea in the past 25 years? I wonder if Kim Jong Un follows the Pirates and has some insight about whether A.J. Burnett will return to the team next season or who will play first base.

Sean's Best & Worst of 2013

Many television shows, magazines, websites and newspapers have best and worst of 2013 lists. What makes my list different is that I'm posting this in January 2014, well after everyone else.

Best Movie I Saw In The Theater: Most lists will have 12 Years a Slave, Gravity, American Hustle or Captain Phillips at the top of the list. Unfortunately, I only saw two movies in the theater in 2013. Therefore, my vote goes to This Is The End starring Seth Rogan, James Franco and Jonah Hill.

Worst Movie I Saw In The Theater: The Heat. I enjoyed this movie, but not as much as This Is The End.

If you think my list so far is a bit ridiculous, I encourage you to stay here. It gets better.

Best Sports Moment: Pirates Wild Card win over the Reds

The first Pirates playoff game since 1992 was incredible. My brother and I drove to Pittsburgh on the evening of the Wild Card game for a funeral the following day. We listened to the first few innings in the car including hearing the "Cueto" chant, him dropping the ball, and Russell Martin's home run. Then, we watched most of the rest of the game with my parents at a Quaker Steak & Lube by the airport and saw the 9th inning and highlights in a small hotel room that we shared as an entire family.





I still get goosebumps watching these videos.

Worst Sports Moment: The entire Penguins-Bruins Eastern conference finals.

Best TV Show: Breaking Bad. In other news, the Earth is round. Honorable mention to Orphan Black, Parks & Recreation, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, and Happy Endings.

Worst TV Show: Oh Sit! CW still hasn't cancelled this show!

Best Book I Read: While Midnight Rising: John Brown and The Raid That Sparked The Civil War by Tony Horwitz was fascinating and Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn was captivating and had the most unexpected twist I experienced in a book in years, I'm going with Someone Could Get Hurt: A Memoir of Twenty-First Century Parenthood by Drew Magary. I really enjoy Magary's writing, and I guess this book seemed to speak to me at this point in my life.

Worst Book I Read: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald. Okay, this may not be the worst book I read, but it definitely did not live up to my expectations. The Great Gatsby is supposed to be known as an American classic, but I didn't get it. I disliked every character, who had no redeeming values, and really don't understand why the book has the status that it does. I already know that Mr. Brame is going to completely disagree with my choice.

Best Song: I Knew You Were Trouble by Taylor Swift. Yes, I've lost any street cred I may have had. I listen to pop music regularly as background noise, and I never got tired of this song. In the middle of writing this, I found that I first wrote a blog post about this song in December 2012. I guess this song isn't eligible for 2013. In that case, I'll go with Macklemore & Ryan Lewis for Thrift Shop and Can't Hold Us.



Worst Song: This was a tough decision. We Can't Stop by Miley Cyrus get an honorable mention, but the winner goes to Perfume by Britney Spears. I just think this is a terrible song.



Best Blog Post: I'm cheating and going with every post of the Pittsburgh Sports Blogger Interview Series.

Worst Blog Post: So many choices. Let's go with Sisqo Coming to Fairfax.

2013 Sean's Ramblings Visitors

Welcome to my annual post where I share data about Sean's Ramblings visitors and how people find this blog. I find this fascinating, and I hope you do too. Here are the top ten number of visitors according to Google Analytics by city for 2013.

1. New York, NY

2. Washington, DC

3. Pittsburgh, PA

4. Arlington, VA

5. Chantilly, VA

6. Los Angeles, CA

7. London

8. Charlotte, NC

9. Deerfield Beach, FL

10. Chicago, IL

Pittsburgh, New York & DC have finished in the top three in that order in 2010-2012 and Pittsburgh finished in the top spot since I started tracking these figures in 2009. However, both New York and DC passed my hometown in 2013. What's going on, Pittsburgh? I expect you to step up in 2014. Meanwhile, if your city is not in the top 10, visit my blog from multiple computers or mobile devices this year early and often!

Just for fun, here are the top 10 number of visitors of Sean's Ramblings by country:

1. United States

2. United Kingdom

3. Canada

4. Australia

5. Germany

6. India

7. Philippines

8. France

9. Netherlands

10. Mexico

I always find it fascinating when people outside of the United States and even Canada discover my blog. With the Winter Olympics and World Cup coming up over the next few months, I expect Russia and Brazil to reach the top 10 in 2014 as journalists utilize Sean's Ramblings for their own research and stories.

Finally, here are the top 10 keywords used in 2013 to find Sean's Ramblings.

1. Sun Refining and Marketing

2. Who is TJR

3. Flavor Flav

4. Fleetwood Mac Concert Reviews

5. Steelers 2013 Schedule

6. Sid Bream Curse

7. Rice Oriental Hamburger Helper Still Available

8. How Could You Leave on Yom Kippur

9. Pitbull Kodak Rhyme

10. Songs with Alcohol in the Title

Some variation of Sun Refining and Marketing (that is what you will see on your credit card and bank account statements when you get gas at Sunoco) was by far the most common way people found my blog in 2013 and would have finished in the #1, #2, #4, #5 & #10 spots. Of the top ten search terms, there is only one repeat from 2012 where "songs with alcohol in the title" finished in 8th.

Thanks to all of you for visiting my blog over the year(s)!

Paparazzi Picture of Joe Manganiello Wearing Steelers Gear

Happy New Year everyone! Anytime that a picture of someone wearing a Pittsburgh sports logo or discussion of Pittsburgh appears in a major magazine, I'm going to blog about it (see Emma Watson and the New Girl cast). Therefore, here is actor Joe Manganiello featured in People a few days ago wearing both a Steelers shirt and hat.

Manganiello was born in Pittsburgh and attended Mount Lebanon High School and Carnegie Mellon University so he certainly has Pittsburgh roots. For me, Manganiello is best known for his roles in True Blood and a guest-starring stint on How I Met Your Mother. He also appeared in several Spider-Man films (though I don't remember him in them) as well as Magic Mike, One Tree Hill and ER. In addition, Joe produced and directed this 2007 short documentary titled DieHardz, about Steelers fans at a Los Angeles bar.



Nice job representing the 'Burgh and the Steelers, Joe!

2013 Sean's Ramblings Year In Review

Welcome to my 9th annual year in review, where I take the first few lines of the first entry of each month in order to produce a random and (hopefully) interesting summary of 2013.

January - Have you ever wondered who visits Sean's Ramblings and how they found this blog? No? Really, it's just me?

February - With the Super Bowl over, it's time to turn our attention to hockey, college basketball and even baseball's Spring Training. Dan, who formally announced his retirement from blogging and one of the people who inspired me to start Sean's Ramblings, passed on this story from last week.

March - We're going all the way to Kuwait for the first video.

April - Today's post comes from Ya Jagoff! ,and is part of a special day of shenanigans from other Pittsburgh Bloggers. Enjoy (and make sure to read all the way to the bottom to see where you can find my guest post)!

May - Although I'm not in the market for a new home, it never hurts to look, right? I've lived in Northern Virginia for almost 12 years, so staying in the Washington DC area makes sense. Obviously, I would want something bigger than where I currently live.

June - The Pittsburgh Penguins are in the Eastern Conference Finals and the Pittsburgh Pirates are tied for the second best record in the majors. Therefore I'm writing about, um, the Pittsburgh Steelers today. I recently received an e-mail from NFLShop.com selling Steelers swimwear.

July - Although this video is a month old, how often have you seen Thomas Dolby perform "She Blinded Me With Science" with astronaut Buzz Aldrin?

August - Although I've followed the Pittsburgh Pirates as closely as ever, I've avoided writing this blog post for many weeks. After collapses in both 2011 and 2012, my fear is that the Pirates will collapse again as soon as I write about the team's success.

September - My son starts his first day of preschool today. It's a brand new place for him with teachers and other kids he has never met. Plus, instead of sleeping in a crib or pack-and-play, he's going to sleep on a mat for the first time.

October - Today should be a happy day as the Pittsburgh Pirates are playing in their first playoff game since 1992. After 20 straight losing seasons, it has been an extraordinary year watching Andrew McCutchen stake his claim as the National League MVP, Pedro Alvarez tie for the league title in home runs, and the pitching staff seemingly always getting key outs. Unfortunately, one of the biggest Pirates fans I know, my cousin Bob, passed away Friday night.

November - You may have noticed that I don't update Sean's Ramblings nearly as often as I used to. I could share a variety of excuses, but really, it's President Obama's fault.

December - You've seen matryoshka dolls (I looked up the name), or Russian nesting dolls, where there are dolls of decreasing size placed inside other dolls. Personally, I think these are really cool. I have no idea where my aunt found this but she gave me one of former Pittsburgh Penguin great Jaromir Jagr.

I hope that you enjoyed Sean's Ramblings in 2013! Thanks for your support, and I'll "see" you here in 2014. Have a Happy New Year!

Steelers-Browns-Chiefs-Chargers Recap

It's time to put the Terrible Towels away until next season. Start the season 0-4 and lose to an awful Oakland Raiders team and you really don't deserve to make the playoffs. Sure, the Steelers should have reached the playoffs based on the mediocre San Diego Chargers' performance against the replacement Kansas City Chiefs (more on this below), but that obviously didn't happen. Here are some of my thoughts about the Steelers-Browns game:

- Steelers RB Le'Veon Bell ran for 90 yards and a TD. He finished the season with 1163 total yards in 13 games. I'm excited to see how Bell progresses in the future.

- While drunk driving is extremely dangerous and drunk drivers certainly deserve the appropriate punishment, you would think that Robocop would do more than catch drunk drivers.



- After Troy Polamalu made a tackle CBS announcer Steve Beuerlein said "You see the way he throws his body around & just gives it up." That sounds a little dirty.

- J.J. Watt should enjoy being in all of these commercials now. On a 2-14 team, he won't be in many (or any) next year.

- At 3:34, Ziggy started knocking things off of the dining room table to get my attention since he wanted food. Doesn't he understand that the Steelers game was on (and that it was too early to eat)?

- Antonio Brown had another solid game (9 catches, 87 yards) as part of an incredible season where he became the first player in NFL history to have at least 5 receptions and 50 yards in all 16 regular season games. While I'm not going to compare Brown with Calvin Johnson, the best WR in the NFL, I do see some potential similarities in the other wide receivers around them. Johnson has never had a really good #2 receiver, though that hasn't stopped him. Meanwhile, with Emmanuel Sanders a free agent, Jerricho Cotchery a year older and Markus Wheaton unimpressive as a rookie, it will be interesting to see how the Steelers surround Brown next year.

I really don't have much more to write about the Steelers game. Jarvis Jones and Lawrence Timmons both played well. The offense played good enough to win, the special teams didn't make any mistakes and the defense played a solid game.

This brings us to the post game. With the Dolphins and Jets both losing, if the Chargers defeated Kansas City, they would be the #6 seed. If they lost to Kansas City, the Steelers would be in the playoffs. It would have been nice if Heinz Field stayed open to show the game on the scoreboard.

What would have been more fun was if the NFL had cameras in the Steelers locker room showing them watching the Chiefs-Chargers game. Better yet, maybe the team could have watched the game at Mike Tomlin's house. Imagine seeing Brett Keisel's reaction when one of Tomlin's kids stands in front of the TV!

- In the NBA, injured or inactive players tend to wear suits or at least dress nicely on the bench. In the NHL, scratched players dress nicely in the booth. Kansas City players such as Alex Smith and Jamaal Charles sure looked professional...wearing Chiefs T-shirts and shorts.

- KC running back Knile Davis is by far my favorite person named Knile.

- Ryan Succop missed a field goal at the end of regulation that would have put the Steelers in the playoffs. That sucked.

- The Chargers ran perhaps one of the dumbest plays in NFL history by doing a fake punt from their own 28 yard-line. If they were unsuccessful, the Chiefs would be in field goal range to try to win the game (again). Instead, the determination that the runner's forward progress was stopped even though there was no whistle or indication by a referee as to where to spot the ball. Oh, and the play couldn't be reviewed. Behind the Steel Curtain has more on this.

- There was also the penalty that should have been called that wasn't called during the final Succop field goal. For all of the complaints about this though, I didn't see anyone mention this during the broadcast or on Twitter when this happened.

Remember my first paragraph about the Steelers not deserving to make the playoffs? San Diego is not much better. They lost to Houston and Washington, the two worst teams in the NFL. Miami & Baltimore don't have any rightful claims to the final AFC Wild Card spot either. Oh well. Big off-season for the Steelers, but I'm optimistic about the team's future.

2013 News Bloopers (Friday Video)

This is an enjoyable and funny video of the best news bloopers of 2013. Please note that it may be NSFW due to some bad words here and there from newscasters. There's also an ad around the 7:15 mark that is fairly annoying. I get ads at the beginning of videos, but why put one in the middle? Anyway, have fun, and I dare you not to laugh.



h/t Deadspin

Random Ramblings

- Over the past few days, my son successfully used the potty three times. This is a huge accomplishment, and one that I felt needed to be shared on Twitter.

@seansramblings Not sure what to make of that, but congrats to your son! The potty is your friend, young man.

— Post Date Lab (@datelab) December 24, 2013

Yes, I really did read The Washington Post Magazine's Date Lab to him on the potty. While I think he is headed in the right direction in becoming potty trained, I learned last night that there is still a long way to go. After sitting on the potty for 10-15 minutes without going while I read him books (and part of Date Lab), as soon as he got off the potty, he urinated on the towel on the floor.



- My car hit 100,000 miles near the Virginia-North Carolina border in March 2012 as part of my annual hockey road trip . My car just reached 110,000 miles a few days ago. Only 10,000 miles in 21 months is fairly impressive.

- Why is orange juice sold in a refrigerated section of grocery stores while apple juice is not?

- In the Yiddish language, the number three is dray. Yes, now every time you hear a Dr. Dre song, you'll think about him as Dr. Three.

- I planned on dedicating an entire blog post to the new online soccer referee recertification exam, but part of the annual recertification class involved a session on social media. We are not to discuss confidential information, so I cannot write that I'm going to work several matches in Brazil next year as part of a tournament that rhymes with Morld Pup.

- There are radio stations that play on Christmas songs in December, but why not a station that plays only love songs around Valentine's Day? How about stations that play summer songs in July (they could play Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince on a loop!) or Halloween songs in October (all Monster Mash, all the time)?

- Finally, I just learned that I know the person who coined the phrase Thanksgivukkah. Go Pittsburgh people!

Crazy Fantasy Football Championship Finish

I'm in 6 fantasy football leagues this year. In hindsight, this is too many leagues. Actually, I realized that this is too many leagues by week 3. Anyway, perhaps due to being in too many leagues, I had a terrible fantasy football season. I only made the playoffs in 2 of the 6 leagues and was eliminated in the first round of the playoffs in one of those leagues. However, I reached the championship in the Pittsburgh Bloggers fantasy football league only to see one of the weirdest and wildest endings in fantasy history. Well, at least my extensive football history.

Going into Monday night, Sean's Team (yes, that's my actual team name) led Shrimp Shack Shooters ("SSS") by 4 points. I had the 49ers defense while SSS had Tony Gonzalez starting. Here's your fantastic finish:

With 2 minutes and 10 seconds remaining, I had a 5 point lead.

2:09 - Tony Gonzalez with a TD catch, but there are two flags on the play...both on SF. The TD catch gave SSS 6 points while causing my DEF to lose points. Instantly, SSS took a 4 point lead.

Atlanta recovers an onside kick. Tony Gonzalez makes another catch or two increasing SSS' receiving yards (& fantasy points).

1:10 - NaVorro Bowman of the SF intercepts a Matt Ryan pass and returns it 89 yards for a TD. The 8 points (6 for the TD & 2 for the INT) gives me a 2 point lead. Woo!

:21 - Gonzalez with an 11 yard catch reduces my lead to 1.

:05 - Gonzalez with a 9 yard catch. While I believe that we're tied, all of a sudden, I'm down 2. I get very confused. (I later discover that Gonzalez's catch gives Atlanta 402 total yards. In the league you get -1 points if your defense allows 350-399 yards but -3 when your defense gives up 400-449 yards. We need to change this next year.)

Last play of the game - SF intercepts the Hail Mary pass. We're tied!

Go to the league rules for tie-breakers, but there are none. Who is the Commissioner of this league? (It's me. Crap.) Well, I'm blaming Alex since he created the league and the rules last year.

So we have a tie and no tie-breaker. I can't say that I'm a fan of a co-champions. Am I the Miami Hurricanes while SSS is the Washington Huskies? One possible solution is to use bench points as a tie-breaker. In this scenario, SSS would win. While I'm fine with giving SSS the title, but we can't really make a new rule on Christmas Eve, right? Christmas spirit or fantasy integrity or something?

Regardless, this was an exciting ending!


Update: For some reason, ESPN determined that SSS won the league. Maybe because he had a better regular season record than me?

Holiday Videos

There's a good chance that you have already seen these holiday videos, but if not, enjoy the Pittsburgh Penguins and the Holderness family videos.



Of all of the song titles, my favorite is "Do Jussi What I See?"

Pittsburgh, Virginia?

Are you a Pittsburgher living in Virginia and looking for a last minute Christmas gift? Here's your chance to show your Pittsburgh spirit by, um, wearing a T-shirt with the word Pittsburgh over the map of Virginia.

While I don't get it, I'll let Teespring, the company designing these shirts, explain:

There are many Pittsburgh fans in the state of Virginia, but unique Penguins fan gear is hard to find. (Sean's note: It is even more unique to find Penguins fan gear that doesn't include anything about the Penguins on it.) Be one of a kind with this Virginia for Pittsburgh limited edition shirt. (You certainly will be one of a kind.)

Each shirt is printed on super soft premium material and remember we always offer a money back guarantee! (Not just soft, super soft!)

This shirt would be perfect...if you lived in Pittsburgh, Virginia. According to Google maps, although there are several Pittsburgh Paints stores in Virginia and a Pittsburgh Tank & Tower Corporation in Virginia Beach, there is no such place as Pittsburgh, Virginia.

Anyway, an ad for Virginia for Pittsburgh T-Shirts appeared on my Facebook feed. In looking at the reactions, plenty of other folks were confused, or worse (several NSFW comments), about these T-shirts. Ah the holiday spirit!

Friday Video: Recovery by Frank Turner

Have you ever thought that you discovered a new artist and/or new song way before everyone else only to learn that the YouTube video for the song has 1.8 million views? I know that I'm not alone on this one (right?). In this case, I'm describing Frank Turner, who apparently is no relation to Ike Turner or Frank Thomas, and his song Recovery.

Enjoy!

Where The Jews At

I love maps. I also love seeing maps with various colors representing, well, anything. In this case, Joshua Comenetz created this map of the U.S. Jewish population by the 113th Congressional districts.



This is fascinating. Here are some notes on the project:

- The estimate of the Jewish population in all Congressional Districts is 6,735,830, approximately 2.18% of the total U.S. population.

- Not surprisingly, there are more Jews in New York City and the greater NYC area than anywhere else. Boston, Philadelphia, Chicago, Atlanta, Los Angeles, Miami, Baltimore, Washington, and San Francisco/San Jose also have Congressional districts with at least 50,000 Jews.

- Conversely, there are virtually no Jews anywhere in North Dakota or South Dakota. The least Jewish district is Oklahoma's 2nd district with 0.004% of the population or 30 people. That's less than the number of people in the Pittsburgh Pirates dugout during a regular season game!

- There are over 10,000 Jews in the southeastern Arizona Congressional district? Even if Tucson is part of this district, that number seems high.

- Want more? The Berman Jewish Databank at the Jewish Federations of North America has a summary of the results including multiple downloads. My favorite is the Excel chart showing the estimated Jewish population of every Congressional district. Apparently, the district where I live has 22,000 Jews or 3.02% of the population

- Comenetz's 10-page PDF summary is available here.

- The Yeshiva World News has information too.

Before Guy Cool, After Guy Sad

We have all seen plenty of advertisements that feature before and after pictures. There's the bald guy in the before picture that thanks to some magical product has a full head of hair in the after picture. Sometimes you see Mike Ditka doing, um, something with his teeth. Easily the most common before-after advertisements show miraculous weight loss among the pictured individual(s). I often find that the pictures are so unclear that you're not even sure that the person is the same. Regardless, the person in the after picture always looks better. Right?

Welcome to this ad by Clarendon Fitness published in a recent Express.

While I believe that Clarendon Fitness wants to show that the guy lost weight due to his use of their gym, you're not quite sure based on the pictures. Does he really look thinner in the after picture? Besides, the guy looks happy, humorous and funny in the before picture and dejected and miserable in the after picture. Did anyone from Clarendon Fitness notice this while proofing the ad? Maybe they were just looking at the woman in the bikini.

The guy is not really the best endorsement for the gym. Of course, maybe everyone is just looking at the woman.

Update: It's always fun when I hear from the company that was the subject of my blog post. Take it away, Clarendon Fitness.

@seansramblings @ClarendonFit lol. I was wondering the same thing. We kicked his butt that day. It was tough losing 80lbs in 6 months.

— Clarendon Fitness (@ClarendonFit) December 18, 2013

The Secret Life of Derek Anderson

You may remember Derek Anderson as probably the greatest Cleveland Browns quarterback of the 21st century. Yes, that's not really high praise. In 2007, Anderson threw for 29 touchdowns (and 19 interceptions) while leading the Browns to a 10-6 record and earning a spot in the Pro Bowl. Of course, Anderson never matched that success going 8-17 as a starter over the next three seasons including a 2-7 record as a member of the Arizona Cardinals. While you may know that Anderson is still in the league as a member of the Carolina Panthers, you may not know that he is an illustrator of one of my son's favorite books: The Potty Train.

While my son really does love this book written by David Hochman & Ruth Kennision and illustrated by Anderson, it really hasn't helped with potty training. We read the book while he is on the toilet, but it's not like he has actually gone potty. Getting back to Anderson, who knew that the former Oregon State quarterback had the time and the ability to illustrate children's books?

Of course, perhaps I have the wrong Derek Anderson. Maybe the illustrator is actually the Derek Anderson who won an NCAA basketball championship with Kentucky and an NBA Championship with the Miami Heat as part of his 12-year NBA career.

Razor Review

I hate shaving. If it were up to me, I'd look like Brett Keisel or one of those Duck Dynasty guys.

Of course, that type of beard may not go over well with some members of family and colleagues. Plus, there would likely be a little gray in my beard these days. Therefore, I generally shave about 6 days per week. It takes way too much time to shave, and despite shaving for about 25 years, I still manage to cut myself more often than I should. Yes, razors can be expensive, but I do what I have to do to look this good!

Enter the MicroTouch One razor.

I jumped at the opportunity to get this razor for free just for reviewing this product. According to the product description, MicroTouch One is the modern version of the timeless classic safety razor. A substantial and precision-crafted tool, MicroTouch One is made of solid brass and chrome plated to a beautiful, polished shine. The razor and the case certainly look cool.

Plus, Rick Harrison of Pawn Stars calls the MicroTouch One razor "the best shave of your life." Although I enjoyed watching Pawn Stars several years ago, I have to disagree with Harrison. Using the MircoTouch One, I had one of the worst shaves of my life, and I've had a lot of bad shaves. After shaving with the MicroTouch One, I actually had to use my regular razor to even the shave. To be fair to MicroTouch One, there's a very good chance there was user error. The product was heavier than I was used to, and I wasn't exactly sure that I put the razor in properly. It never felt right though I could certainly feel a razor against my skin. While I could (and probably should) try the razor again, I just don't have time in the morning to mess around with this again.

For $19.99, the case, the razor and the 12 blades seems like a good deal. It just wasn't for me.

Despite this not-so-glowing review, I'm certainly happy to continue to review other products companies want to send me for free! Operators are standing by!

Random Quotes

- Although we've already discussed Selena Gomez singing about Mr. T in her song Slow Down, there's another line that I wanted to bring to your attention.

You know I'm good with mouth to mouth resuscitation.

Does that mean that Selena Gomez has her CPR license? Has she actually saved someone from drowning in her previous job as a lifeguard? Is there a rating system of mouth to mouth resuscitation and how do we know that Selena is on the good side?

- I recently completed Billy Crystal's book Still Foolin' 'Em: Where I've Been, Where I'm Going, and Where the Hell Are My Keys? I found the book entertaining and found many of his stories, including any interaction with Muhammad Ali, fascinating. Of course, I needed to share his experience playing in a Spring Training game as a member of the New York Yankees against the Pittsburgh Pirates.

"The Pirates pitcher was Paul Maholm: six foot two, 220 pounds, from Mississippi. Never been to a Seder."

"The windup, the pitch. It's a cutter. The nastiest cutter I've seen since my bris."

Ha!

- A few weeks ago, Bob Smizik of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette wrote a blog post about how aggressive the St. Louis Cardinals had been in upgrading their roster. Commentor Bill Maloni wrote my favorite reply.

Um, because he's a prospect for the Pirates?

They don't have the money to sign Byrd; they don't have the money to sign Peralta; they bailed at giving AJ an offer sheet; and they missed out on Jack Johnson.

How could the Pirates miss out on Jack Johnson? Clearly, the team needed to get the laid-back, Hawaiian musician on their roster!

- Unlike Lady Gaga in her new song with R Kelly, I have never told anyone that they can do what they want with my body. Have you?

My Grammar Battle with a Newspaper Editor

Let me preface this post by stating that grammar, spelling and vocabulary are not my strong suits. My SAT verbal score was below average. It's actually amazing that I've written this blog for so long.

I also understand that grammar and spelling are seemingly non-existent on Twitter. People type quickly or post Tweets from their phones which can make it difficult for editing. Plus, many people mistake your for you're way too often. Maybe it is wrong of me, but I tend to hold journalists and editors to a higher standards on Twitter than your typical high school student. That's why I am irked by this with correspondence Jerry Micco, the Assistant Managing Editor/Sports at the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.

@PG_JerryMicco Did you really just type "folo" in place of follow?

— Sean's Ramblings (@seansramblings) December 10, 2013

@PG_JerryMicco In that case thank u 4 the reply. Hope 2 c u ltr. Hagd. (That wood b, have a good day.)

— Sean's Ramblings (@seansramblings) December 10, 2013

Take a look at the first Tweet. By my count, Jerry only used 110 of the 140 characters allotted by Twitter. Seems like there are more than enough characters to add an extra "L" and "W" particularly when there are two spaces between Mike and Tomlin.

To Jerry's reply to me, is there a spelling police? Maybe this is some kind of NSA force that Edward Snowden exposed. Jerry might know this through his newspaper access.

Oh, it's always nice to be called dude by a guy in his mid to late 50s.

Steelers-Dolphins Recap

The Steelers season is over. I mean, they're still going to play three more games, but the team has virtually no chance of making the playoffs. The Steelers have had moments this season where they looked amazing, but there have been more times when they have not looked good. Too many offensive turnovers early in the season. The inability for the defense to make big stops. Injuries. Questions about coaching and personnel. There's going to be a lot of talk in the next few days, weeks and months about where the team goes from here, but, as the title suggests, I want to share my thoughts about Sunday's game. As always, my recaps are different than any other Steelers recap you'll read.

- Let's start with the final play of the game. Here's what I think the Dolphins players were thinking during this play.

Oh, this is cute. The Steelers are going to try to lateral all over the field. Oh, an offensive lineman has the ball. Hilarious. Isn't this where they started at the beginning of the play? Back to Big Ben. Wait, is he allowed to throw it down the field again? Let's just tackle him anyway. He just flipped the ball to Antonio Brown. Was that a forward lateral? Hold on. Antonio Brown has the ball. Holy crap! Not Antonio Brown. He's really, really fast and really, really good. Uh oh. Uh oh. Ref called him out of bounds. He was out, right? Okay. Whew. That was close. Let's get out of the cold and get some Smiley Cookies.

- I'm always amazed at the number of players who do not wear long-sleeve shirts underneath their jerseys on cold games. What you usually don't see is the same players putting on heavy jackets on the sidelines. I think NFL players are sending the wrong message here. Basically, their actions are showing that it is okay to expose your arms in freezing temperatures. This could increase the number of potential frostbite cases among people trying to emulate their favorite players. WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

- For the Steelers, you can't expect to win while giving up 181 rushing yards, especially when Daniel Thomas (!) runs for over 100 yards.

- Cameron Heyward has really played well this season. He had 10 tackles on Sunday, including a sack, and a batted-down pass. Heyward just needs to be careful to not go all Hulk Hogan and slam his opponents down on the turf.

- The Dolphins have an offensive lineman named John Jerry. I bet you didn't know this, but John Jerry Jingleheimer Schmidt; his name is my name too!

- This is the only truly serious part of the recap, so feel free to skip this section if you'd like to read my usual humorous banter. During the Thanksgiving game against the Ravens, Steelers running back Le'Veon Bell appeared to get knocked unconscious late in the game and was later diagnosed with a concussion. As the witty announcer Dan Fouts said, he got his Bell rung. Cute. Anyway, with all we have learned about concussions and brain injuries over the past few years, it seems, questionable, at best that Bell returned to the field only 10 days after his injury. I guess that the doctors cleared him to play, but his head injury has to be concerning.

- It seems like nearly every Steelers-Dolphins game is played in bad weather. There was the 3-0 Steelers win in a 2007 Monday Night game which started late due to a major thunderstorm. I also seem to remember a game in Miami where there was tropical storm rain.

- Grudge Match with Robert De Niro and Sylvester Stallone looks like a terrible movie. I hope that Alan Arkin is getting paid well to appear in this film.

- I was surprised that Troy Polamalu's interception return for a touchdown was only his 3rd pick-6 of his career. I thought he had more.

- Miami's Charles Clay is arguably the most successful Clay since former Congressman Henry Clay. You didn't expect to see a reference to the former Whig Party Presidential candidate as well the Speaker of the House and Senator from Kentucky in the Dolphins-Steelers recap, did you?

I'm guessing a live blog of next week's Sunday night game against the Bengals is unlikely.

The Curse Of Taylor Swift

Take a look at this picture:

From left to right, you have Max Talbot, Jordan Staal, Taylor Swift, Alex Goligoski & Tyler Kennedy. I'm not sure when this picture took place, but it was at a time when the four guys pictured all played for the Pittsburgh Penguins while Taylor Swift wasn't feeling 22 yet. Anyway, all four of the players are no longer part of the Penguins organization, and while they have each done well financially, they have not achieved the level of professional success they did as members of the Penguins. So is there a Taylor Swift curse?

From yesterday's Pittsburgh Post-Gazette interview with Tyler Kennedy:

It’s pretty crazy, but that’s hockey. Not too many guys stay with the same team their whole career. Maybe it was that Taylor Swift [jinx] thing. I don’t think I’ll be going to any concerts in San Jose with Taylor Swift, that’s for sure. But I thought we really came together as a line, and I think we had a great two, three years. We really became close as friends. Maybe that’s why we did so well on the ice. The biggest thing was, we just played well together.

(emphasis added)

Did they know she was trouble when she walked in? I wonder if there are teardrops on guitars somewhere.

What Is The Worst Excuse You Ever Used?

My trip to the dentist on Monday reminded me of a visit to my pediatric dentist as a kid. During the cleaning many years ago, my dentist asked me if I knew there was a piece of bread or cereal in my mouth. My reply was no and that I thought it was a tooth. I don't think that reply went over very well with him.

Possibly because of this incident, I make sure to brush my teeth and not eat anything else after brushing before my appointment. I also learned not to provide excuses to dentists. I currently have a great relationship with my dentist, and she even got us an electric toothbrush as a wedding gift. I think that one of the reasons is that we have an honest and open teeth relationship. Early on, she asked me if I floss, and I said no. She hasn't asked me since, and my teeth have always looked good. I've had other dentists tell me that I should floss, and for some reason, I resent this. It's like the dentists went to some type of school that teaches them to guilt patients into buying floss. I bet Oral-B is behind this!

So what's the worst excuse that you ever used? Did it work?

On a completely different subject, why is there still no updated technology for x-raying teeth so that you don't have to wear the heavy vest?

Found In My Basement: European Penguins

You've seen matryoshka dolls (I looked up the name), or Russian nesting dolls, where there are dolls of decreasing size placed inside other dolls. Personally, I think these are really cool. I have no idea where my aunt found this but she gave me one of former Pittsburgh Penguin great Jaromir Jagr.

Inside Jagr are a collection of Penguins from the late 1990s all from the USSR (Darius Kasparaitis, Alex Kovalev, Aleksey Morozov) or Czechoslovakia (Jagr & Martin Straka)

I feel like Robert Lang or Jan Hrdina were probably upset that they weren't included. Oh, this doll is out of my basement and into the living room.


Please make sure to see other items found in my basement.