I’m Overwhelmed

Yes, this happens from time to time, but I’m currently overwhelmed because I'm overcommitted. Setting aside my work responsibilities (which isn’t easy to do because I’m slammed right now), I have three separate volunteer positions that are keeping me way too busy. Here they are in no particular order.

1. Soccer Coach

After watching the men’s World Cup this summer, Luigi (now in 4th grade) decided he wanted to play soccer this fall for the first time in about three years. Despite playing soccer on my high school soccer team (well, being on the bench on my high school team) and being a soccer referee, my kids all stopped playing soccer years ago. So when Luigi expressed interest in playing again, and we confirmed multiple times over several weeks that he truly wanted to play, I was all for it. The one caveat was that I wasn't going to be the head coach.

In late August, we got an email from the age group coordinator stating that Luigi's team didn’t have a coach. Without another volunteer, they would be forced to consolidate the number of teams, meaning more kids per team, less playing time, and fewer games. 24 hours after receiving this email (in the hopes that someone else volunteered), I replied that I could help but as an assistant since I had several other commitments and would miss several games and practices. Two hours later, I got a response from the coordinator thanking me for being a head coach. Ugh. 

The team has two practices and a game each week. While I do have some help, particularly from one dad who creates a substitution plan/schedule for the games, it’s still up to me to come up with practice activities and then send multiple practice and game email reminders per week. On the positive side, I have a good group of kids and the team is 3-1 so far. Still, parts of each practice is like herding cats.

2. Scout Troop Volunteer

Pedro Tulo (7th grade) joined Scouts in the spring of 2025. I’m not a campout guy, so I said I would assist in helping with the Court of Honor ceremonies and with merit badges. I had no idea what any of that meant. The mom who held the Merit Badge and Rank Advancement Coordinator role (I’m still not 100% sure this is the correct title) and her son both took a break from the troop earlier this year, so I got thrown into the position. The troop holds a Court Of Honor twice a year. It’s a ceremony where the Scouts get awarded their merit badges and honored for rank advancement. While I’m fortunate that other parents help in several areas, it’s time consuming tracking the scouts’ merit badge progression and coordinating rank advancement meetings. I always have to visit the Scout Store at least once or twice (hopefully just once!) just before the Court of Honor to purchase rank pins and merit badges. 

Oh, and entering all the information into the online Scoutbook system is maddening. It’s not intuitive, and I can never figure out how to run any reports I want. Is it that difficult to allow the user to enter multiple merit badges together instead of doing each one individually? Things should hopefully settle down after the fall Court of Honor. But even then, scouts have questions about various merit badges and blue cards, and I rarely know the answers.

3. Synagogue board

We joined our synagogue about 10 years ago and attended Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services for several years before we became members. Outside of family, the synagogue and the people at the synagogue are our Jewish home. It's not too big and not too small, and there are plenty of activities and services available for me and my family. In the spring, I was asked to be on the board as the fundraising chair. I couldn't say no. I mean, I guess I could, but I didn’t. I helped organize a Bingo event in May or June and formally joined the board effective July 1. 

For the most part, my role involves event planning, but I also attend monthly board meetings and have served as a greeter/usher at a few services. The event planning part is difficult. Because I was a fairly late addition to the board, I wasn't really involved with the calendar process. So a trivia night is tentatively scheduled for later this fall, but the date isn't confirmed. We're looking to do an 80s dance party in the spring, and I'd love to hold a casino night, but that seems unlikely for the 2026-2027 year. Maybe next year. I also want to organize a "stock market" game where individuals pay something like $25 to enter, and then you pick 5 stocks, and the winner is the person who does the best. Actual cash prizes. I need some help with the specifics though.

I’ll admit that I feel a little pressure in the fundraising position. Synagogue dues don’t cover all of the operating expenses, so these events and other fundraising activities are important. And do you know what’s the biggest expense? It’s not staff salaries and benefits or building-related maintenance. It’s security. This makes me both sad and angry. Synagogues, churches, mosques, and other places of worship should be safe spaces. Unfortunately, not having security is not an option. We all know what happened at Tree of Life in Pittsburgh, the synagogue I attended growing up and where I had my Bar Mitzvah. Just last month, a similar situation nearly occurred in Belleville, Ontario. Antisemitic-related incidents are the highest they have been in America in years. 

All of this is a topic for another time. While I don’t want to get into it now, sports teams, government agencies, companies, etc. will post Happy Hanukkah messages in December. And they are nice to see. But look (or don’t look) at the comments and you’ll see plenty of vile responses or those that are trying to be funny but aren’t and are insensitive or mean at best. The point is my synagogue is an important place for me, my family, and the community. And it’s more expensive to operate than it should be because of the world we’re in. Anyway, I have a trivia night that I need to plan. It will be fun, but it’s work to put together.

4. Basketball Coach

At the beginning of this post, I wrote that there are three volunteer roles keeping me busy. Well, this is breaking news. Just in time for Luigi’s soccer season to end, I’m going to coach his basketball team again this winter. One of the parents from last year’s team requested me to be their son’s coach this year. I saw the assistant coach from last year recently, and he wants to work together again too. The end result is that I’m returning to coaching soccer.

Now part of me coaching is to help my 15 year old, The Moose. He and a few of his friends want to coach a team, but they need to be 16 to be a head coach. The idea is that the assistant coach and I will lead practices and games at the start of the season with the teenagers running some of the activities at practice. Hopefully, this goes well, and as the season progresses, they will essentially take over with us adults basically being there to supervise.

I’ve worked on this post for several weeks. Between work, my volunteer roles, and just taking kids from activity to activity, I haven’t had much time to write lately. It’s taking me forever to finish reading a book. I’m not even watching many television shows lately. I’ll get my act together again at some point, but I don’t know when that will be. Please don't feel bad for me. This is all my own fault. I'll figure it out by taking thing one day at a time. Hey, that could be a show title!

Stock market photo by Stephen Chernin / Stringer / Getty Images