Cameo

There is a website called Cameo where you can pay for personalized messages by celebrities. This is an absolutely brilliant idea. The phrase "absolutely brilliant" should only be said in a British accent. Anyway, I've explored the website a little lately, and I can probably spend many more hours there. Here's what I found so far.

The first item I searched for was Pittsburgh Steelers. Naturally, Hall of Famers like Jerome Bettis ($300), Rod Woodson ($175), Dermontti Dawson ($100) were the most expensive. I feel like Arthur Moats ($25) and my new favorite player Zach Banner ($35) are bargains. I also believe that either Merril Hoge ($60) isn't charging enough or Xavier Grimble ($60) is charging too much. As a bit of a tangent, a few weeks ago, Steelers Depot posted this quote from Terry Bradshaw on Twitter, "The most money I ever made was $300,000. And back then you were paying fifty cents of that to the government, so add it up. Everything I had, I had to borrow money. I even mortgaged my NFL contract to buy a ranch and a tractor and a cutter to cut hay. Why did I mention this? Bradshaw is charging $500 for a Cameo!

You may remember the song "Say Hey I Love You" by Michael Franti and Spearhead from about a decade ago.



I'll admit that I only know Franti from this song, so I was surprised that a Cameo from him is $175 while one from Mya, who may be best known from batting lead-off in Lady Marmalade, but who also appeared in movies and Dancing With The Stars is $150.

Flavor Flav was a member of Public Enemy and starred in the reality television dating show Flavor of Love. When I first drafted this post, a Cameo from Flavor Flav was $350. Apparently, there is now a sale on getting a message from Flav as the price is $250.

Let's say that you want to get a message from a former world leader. Well, you're in luck! Just get a Cameo from former President of Mexico, Vicente Fox for $255. Want to get a message from a former state leader who served time in jail? You're in luck again! Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich is on here for $80 (or slightly less than a Merril Hoge / Arthur Moats combo). By the way, if Donald Trump loses in November, I can easily see him charging $1000 per video, and if that happens, I hope someone has him say "person, woman, man, camera, TV" over and over again. (This statement makes more sense when you watch the amazing rambling that starts around the 2:30 mark of this video.)



Pittsburgh Pirates fans! I know there are still some of us out there. 2018 first round draft pick Travis Swaggerty could be a bargain at $15. Former Pirate Aramis Ramirez is definitely a bargain at $15. 2020 opening day starter Joe Musgrove is $50. Trevor Williams was $25 and Cole Tucker was $50, but they're now both temporarily unavailable. Maybe they're too busy with the start of the season. Actually, if Musgrove has a bad start on Friday, I'm blaming it on the fact that he's too busy being on Cameo and not spending enough time watching videos to prepare for the game!

Andrew McCutchen is on there for $150. I mention this for all of the Penguins fans out there. Cutch was an MVP for the Pirates. Alex Galchenyuk played a whopping 45 games for the Pens this season before getting traded in February to the Minnesota Wild for Jason Zucker. In his 8 NHL seasons, Galchenyuk has 108 goals and 147 assists. That's not bad, but Galchenyuk has never been an all star. I mention this because, although his Cameo is temporarily unavailable, it costs $180 to get one from him. There's no world where anything associated with Galchenyuk should be worth more than anything associated with McCutchen. He's just so cool.

Otherwise, the Penguins are vastly underrepresented on Cameo. George Laraque is available for $70, Frank Corrado who played 7 games for the Pens is there for $10, while penguins at the Philadelphia zoo is listed at $40. Sadly, it doesn't appear that the penguins actually talk much in the videos.



Finally, I noticed that there is a category for bloggers. And there are 768 bloggers listed! 768! This can't be correct since there are only about 100 active bloggers still writing. Maybe this is the way that I can finally make big money from my blog. How much would you pay for me to make a video wishing you a happy birthday or anniversary? I mean, I know that priceless is the likely answer, but how about $2000? Maybe $1000? I mean, the most money I ever made was $300,000 before taxes. I borrow money and even mortgaged my blogging contract to buy a ranch and a tractor and a cutter to cut hay, so I think I'll start asking for $500!

One more finally, finally. I can't have a post about Cameo without including this song.



Although this post was not sponsored by Cameo, I really wish that it was. Maybe the company will see this and let me send a message for free. I mean, it wouldn't be at the Terry Bradshaw or Flavor Flav level, but someone from Below Deck Mediterranean would be fine.

The Pittsburgh Pirates

After trading Gerrit Cole to the Houston Astros, I decided to ask several friends, who have been Pittsburgh Pirates fans for many years, their thoughts on the trade and the state of the Pirates. In the middle of this conversation, the Pirates traded former National League MVP Andrew McCutchen to the San Francisco Giants.

Nick: I think it will take a few years before we can accurately assess the trade-- that's how long it took for Robbie Grossman to become a semi-useful player. I mean, who would have predicted that Wade Davis would be the most valuable piece in the James Shields-Wil Myers trade? Ultimately, it's a decent haul, even without a headliner. I don't see Musgrove's future as a starter, but both arms are nice bullpen pieces and can be flipped in a year or two to reload further. 7th and 8th inning guys have never been more valuable. Moran could be OK, he has some pop. The Pirates have no pop and no ability to score runs. I love that his most direct comp is... David Freese.

Gobo: I think, without the context of who runs the Pirates (including Nutting and Huntington), the trade makes sense. Cole was never going to sign with the Pirates once he became a free agent, and frankly, he never quite lived up to the hype after Game 2 against the Cardinals in 2013. So I don't have a problem with trading him now. I don't have a problem with the return in theory. I think an important thing about Moran specifically is that he bats lefty, and the Pirates, even in their good years, have had a righty-heavy lineup. Even now, assuming Moran is the starting 3B, there are only 2 lefties plus one switch in the lineup.

The real problem is that nobody in the fan base trusts this management group. They had chances, particularly in 2014 and 2015, to go all-in, and they refused. This trade, even if the correct move, appears as just another emblem of that, and it pisses people off. If Theo Epstein made this trade, people would be singing its praises, or at least evaluating it from a balanced perspective. But with Nutting/Huntington, the default view is that winning a championship isn't goal #1, and this reinforces that view.

Sean: Gobo and Nick - How dare you have reasonable responses that make sense!

And then news started coming out of an Andrew McCutchen trade.

Nick: I’m sure I’ll say something nasty about the Cutch Trade when they announce the return.

Marc: Looks like we won’t have to wait long to find out...

http://www.espn.com/mlb/story/_/id/22111712/andrew-mccutchen-traded-san-francisco-giants-pittsburgh-pirates

Jamie: Looks like Cutch was traded for a relief pitcher.

Gobo nailed it. Management lost the fan base's trust. And it's well deserved. Until we can go into an offseason confident that they'll add $30 million in free agents and any salary dump will be of the Mark Melancon variety, we shouldn't trust these guys. There's no stud prospects on the horizon and no reason to assume 2018 won't be a flirtation with 500. Cole wasn't the ace we needed, so instead of getting the ace we've needed since Doug Drabek left town, they just dumped $21 million in salary and have zero intention to spend it on anyone who could help. This team doesn't need a Musgrove, Moran or Crick to get them to October. It doesn't need another bullpen arm to reach the playoffs. It's not a few pieces away. The offense has evolved into Josh Bell and 7 guys who hit 10-15 HR and a rotation of #3 and #4 starters. We're looking at a $70+ million payroll I'm 2018, which I believe places us last in the division by a lot. The only upside to all this is at least we're not the Marlins.

Sean: Did the Pirates really just trade Cutch for Burt Reynolds and a guy we can call Crick? Good for Cutch. Sad day for Pirates fans.

Nick: Kyle Crick throws gas and was touted as the next starter in line to ascend after Cain, Lincecum, Mad Bum. The other guy they got was the #4 prospect in a heinous farm season. They got more than they would get from a sandwich pick if they extended a QO. Sadly, this is Cutch’s value right now, he’s not exactly cheap and the Giants took the whole contract.

I only feel bad for Cutch in that there’s a very real chance the Pirates win more games than the Giants this year?

Harrison to the Mets?

Sean: (slightly out of order but in response to Nick) I know Longoria isn't what he was from a few years ago on the Rays, but I'll take the Giants having more wins than the Pirates in 2018.

Jamie: Reynolds is another 4th of on a good team, 15 hr guy. Ugh. Giants aren't even covering all of Cutch, we're eating 2.5 million. Total cost savings between Cole and Cutch is around 19 million with 500,000 in international bonus money. A sad day. Ya, I'd say JHay is out the door next.

Gobo: Yeah, the only thing that matters at this point is that everyone in greater Pittsburgh immediately start calling Kyle Crick "Turtle."

Dan: I'm not a Nutting apologist, exactly, but......here's my take.

Despite some fan delusions to the contrary, this team was not going to be very good. Better than last year if everything went right, but that's about all you can say. It's time for the next "window," much as people don't like to hear that term. It's just the reality.

The only question was whether they could get more now or at the deadline, and I'm not privy to that sort of info.

On free agency and ownership: If there are Russell Martins to be had, let's get one. Although it's the same problem of the last few years -- they had solid, if unspectacular guys at every position. There was never a blatant upgrade area.

Jamie, If you mean really *big* free agents, I can't fault an owner for not going that route in a horribly broken system. Most big signings you can name were wastes of money overall, and the teams signing them simply don't care. They get a crack or two at a World Series before they flush the remaining $50-$100 down the toilet.

Do I wish we had someone who was willing to flush huge amounts of money down the toilet because he really wants a title? Sure. Mark Cuban would be nice. But I'm not going to sit here and torch Nutting because he's not willing to give up a vast personal fortune so a bunch of yinzers he doesn't know can celebrate a championship they had nothing to do with.

Also, for what it's worth, I assume Crick will be a starter again. Post-hype top prospect + Searage = why not? And I like the look of Reynolds. He's exactly the kind of guy I target in the farm draft.

"Also Also": It's easy to say the Pirates didn't go "all in" in those good years. But neither did many other teams. It's not like that actually *works* most of the time. The math is always overwhelmingly against you. If they go all in, they have, what, maybe an 8% chance at a WS instead of 6%? And a far, far higher probability of making it the only shot they have.

Most teams simply aren't doing that anymore, are they?

Jamie:I don't disagree with you at all about the team's upside. That's the problem. The only free agent I want is a #1 starter. I've always maintained that guys like Cole will never reach their potential until they're a #2 or #3 starter behind a great veteran who knows what they're doing. Is that veteran always "worth" their contract on the back end? Probably not, but it's a cost of doing business and not my problem. Cole was immediately pushed into the #1 role and only thrived when Liriano was briefly pitching like a #1. Had we added a #1 starter to the roster we had, we'd have a $110 million payroll and a good shot at the postseason. Now we have a $70 million dollar payroll and zero shot. Crick as a starter has the upside of 15 good starts before he blows out his arm.

Sorry, just not feeling it now. I liked Cutch. Turtle Crick is a damn good nickname, but I'm just not feeling it for this team. My boys were starting to become big Pirates fans, so it's really a double whammy for me.

Why play the season at all?

It's sports. Going all in is kind of the point.

Dan: Regarding pitchers: it's not a smart -- or winning -- strategy.

http://ftw.usatoday.com/2015/01/max-scherzer-james-shields-free-agent-pitchers-contracts-100-million-mlb

And no, it's certainly not our problem. But Nutting's what we're stuck with, and his strategy is reasonably sound based on current statistical and financial realities. No matter how much fans bang their heads against a wall, it's not going to make him spend $100 million on an arm destined for someone's operating table or a 4.00 ERA. I wouldn't do it, either. I'd keep trying until I developed one myself.

Now if you want to torch this organization, you torch them for the unreal Cleveland Browns-like track record of putrid player selection and development for 20+ years. The jury is still out on whether they really know what they're doing now, or if the McCutchen/Cole/Marte era is just the proverbial blind squirrel getting the nut.

Sean: I agree with the idea of starting over. If you're not going to make the playoffs, why not trade your best players instead of simply treading water and being mediocre? The problem, as mentioned before, is the scouting and development. When was the last time the Pirates drafted an elite player? (The answer is Cutch and that was before the NH era.) The Rivero trade was great, but how many other trades have worked out well over the last few years?

I guess we have to hope that some of the players acquired for Cole and Cutch (and maybe Harrison and/or Freese) turn into all-star caliber players and that the Pirates, with likely a top-5 draft pick, get someone on the level of Cutch. That's a long wait though, and again, there's not a great track record from the current front office.

Nick: The Pirates always win when Melancon is in a trade.

Seeing A No-Hitter With My Son

One of my dreams/bucket list items is to attend a no-hitter in person. In July 2001, I saw Todd Ritchie (yes, Todd Ritchie) go 8 1/3 innings before giving up a single. After seeing probably over 100 baseball games in my lifetime, that was the closest I've come to seeing a no-hitter. Meanwhile, I took my son (The Moose, age 4) to his first baseball game on Saturday night. He has now attended one single baseball game and has witnessed a no-hitter (and almost the 22nd perfect major league game since 1900). He has no idea that this is a big deal. On to my notes and thoughts on the game and taking The Moose to his first game.

- Breaking news: Max Scherzer is really, really good. Maybe that's why the Nationals paid him over $200 million. I'm a Pirates fan and definitely wanted the Bucs to win, but I can appreciate an amazing pitching performance and found myself rooting for a perfect game in the top of the 9th.

- After the first inning, The Moose told me that he wanted to go home. That's when I went into food mode. I offered him a fruit bar that I had in my bag and then we quickly went to the concession stand to get french fries and a Sprite. He loved the Sprite and made it through the rest of the game (sitting on my lap for nearly all of it) without any complaints.

- In either the 7th inning or top of the 8th inning, I looked at the scoreboard and mentioned to my friend that we were watching a perfect game. We knew it was a no-hitter but had no idea we were watching a potential perfect game until then.

- I did a terrible job of taking pictures during the game. Really, I just wanted to make sure my kid was happy and that I didn't lose him in the crowd of over 40,000. I did take this picture of several members of the Pirates walking to the bullpen before the game. Plus, both Bryce Harper and Andrew McCutchen sat in my section!

- I also should have taken a picture of someone wearing a Pirates' Garrett Jones jersey.

- Unwritten rules in baseball are stupid. In the 8th inning, the Nats shifted against Pedro Alvarez. Pedro could have bunted towards the deserted third base line to reach on a single, but that's not permitted in baseball. Well, if it was a 1-0 game, maybe that would have been a little acceptable, but baseball folks would have gone insane if Pedro did this on Saturday. If you think the reaction to Jose Tabata reaching on a hit-by-pitch was crazy, Pedro would have been vilified even more.

- The Nationals had a promotion on Saturday where after the game, Seniors could stroll the bases. During the game, I talked with my friend about the fact I tweaked my knee (for the second time in a month) earlier in the day working as a soccer referee), probably will need bifocals soon and that I recently went to the dentist and learned that I have receding gums. Basically, I could have been eligible to run the bases!

- When we got home, all The Moose talked about to my wife was chocolate syrup. Naturally, she had not idea what he was talking about. I mean why would there be chocolate syrup at a baseball game? Here's the answer:



MASN's Dan Kolko did not look happy about Jayson Werth dumping chocolate syrup on him. I'd bet $10 that Werth doesn't pay the dry-cleaning bill.

- The Moose wasn't very impressed by the Presidents/Pierogi race. I think he found the characters a little scary.

- I'd like to give the Nationals credit for posting the artist and song title for each hitter's walk-up music on the scoreboard. That was a nice touch particularly since I didn't know many songs.

- Quick rant: I love keeping ticket stubs of sporting events/concerts I attend. However, there are less and less ticket stubs these days and you generally print off your tickets now. Even Nats season ticket holders get a card that they swipe or scan at the gate instead of receiving individual tickets. Here is part of my ticket from Saturday's game that is now folded up on a regular 8.5 x 11 piece of paper.

- I don't ever want to drive through a hurricane, but I feel like I got a taste of what it's like to do so going home after the game. There were massive thunderstorms on Saturday evening with extremely heavy rain and lightning everywhere. I'm glad that the game was at 4:05 since a 7:05 game would have been postponed.

Here's more about the game:

The Washington Post (here and here

People were mad at Tabata (also The Washington Post)

Dejan Kovacevich wrote a really good piece in support of Tabata. [DK on Pittsburgh Sports]

Clinton Yates agreed with DK. [Washington Post again]

Josh Yohe of DK on Pittsburgh Sports
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
ESPN

Video of the top of the 9th [MLB]

Friday Links

The Celebrate Fairfax festival is only a week away. How the heck did that happen? I've written about Northern Virginia's largest festival dozens of times over the years, so I'll just simply write that if you live in the DC area, you should go. Early bird ticket sales end tomorrow (Saturday, May 30th) so purchase your tickets now. [Celebrate Fairfax]

Andrew McCutchen's pay stub is fascinating. It's interesting that he doesn't have any money taken out for flexible spending. [Deadspin]

Congrats to HG Balas, a terrific writer, who is now going to write for the Pittsburgh Downtown Community Development Corporation's e-newsletter, The Downtowner. [The Steel Trap]

In the year I was born, Sean was the 39th most popular boy's name. If I was born today, my name would be Hunter.
My 2000s name: Patrick.
90s name: Jared.
80s name: Erik.
60s & 70s name: Gerald (though since I was born in the 70s, wouldn't I just be Sean?)
What would your name be? [Time magazine]

My friend Christine encourages you to help military families oversees. [The Adventures of ChrisMichRob in Korea]

Have a nice weekend everyone!

Play Pedro Alvarez In Right Field

Pittsburgh Pirates third baseman Pedro Alvarez is struggling. Actually, that may be an understatement. Alvarez seems to have lost the ability to accurately throw the ball to first base. He leads the majors in errors and has been replaced by Josh Harrison. Meanwhile, Alvarez led the National League in home runs last season and is one of the best power hitters in baseball when he gets on a hot streak. However, he's not going to get on any type of hot streak since he's not actually playing other than an occasional pinch hitting appearance. Alvarez is out of options (meaning that he can't get sent down to the minor leagues), so the Pirates appear to be stuck. Pedro is a major defensive liability, yet, no one on the team can match his power.

With the Pirates (likely) placing reigning NL MVP Andrew McCutchen on the disabled list, the team needs to find a way to get Pedro into the line-up. Since Harrison is now playing third, my solution is to start Pedro in right field. Yes, this may be crazy, but what are the other options?

Let's start with why this won't work. Pedro Alvarez has only played third base during his time with the Pirates, in the minor leagues and at Vanderbilt University. Maybe Alvarez played some outfield in high school, but to my knowledge, he did not. Teaching a player a new position in, oh, two days doesn't seem like a recipe for success. Plus, PNC Park requires athletic outfielders in both left field and center field. Alvarez is likely not athletic enough for either of these positions. With McCutchen going on the DL, Starling Marte can move to center. Do you move rookie Gregory Polanco to a brand new position to accommodate Alvarez?

Now the alternative. The Pirates recently signed Jayson Nix who has already played in Philadelphia and Tampa this season. You can play him and move Harrison to OF along with Marte and Polanco. You can also keep Harrison at 3B and have Travis Snider or Jose Tabata as your regular outfielders. Regardless, a Pirates line-up without McCutchen and Alvarez is not intimidating and not one that you would expect to regularly score more than 3 runs per game. Alvarez has the ability to hit game-changing home runs and his on-base percentage has improved from last season.

If you're looking for a similar situation, the Nationals moved Ryan Zimmerman to the outfield this season, a position he never played previously. That experiment seemed to go well until he got re-injured (which had nothing to do with the move to the outfield).

Vote for Pedro (to play right field)!

I'm Still Here

I hope to publish a major blog post later this week, but in the meantime, here are a few videos for your Monday.

Plunder the lox! [Pirates Prospects]



Teemu Selanne at his final regular season home game in Anaheim. Very cool that he included former teammate Jean-Sebastien Giguere for a victory lap. [h/t Deadspin]



Finally, Happy Passover! (Some of this may be offensive. Funny, but possibly offensive to some.)

Talk Like A Pittsburgh Pirate Day

The writers, actors and everyone else associated with Parks & Recreation are brilliant. In the "Article Two" episode that aired on April 18th, the show featured this reference to Talk Like a Pittsburgh Pirate Day on November 16th:



It is extremely appropriate that the first celebration of Talk Like a Pittsburgh Pirate Day is talking place only two days after Andrew McCutchen won the National League MVP award. So on November 16th, go ahead and talk like McCutchen. Talk like Roberto Clemente. Talk like Bill Mazeroski. Talk like Willie Stargell. Talk like Bob Prince. Talk like Gerrit Cole or Pedro Alvarez or Starling Marte.

You can simply walk around saying No Doubt About It or Raise It while flashing folks the Zoltan sign.

Whatever you do, talk like a Pittsburgh Pirate!

Bittersweet Day (Bob: 1927-2013)

Today should be a happy day as the Pittsburgh Pirates are playing in their first playoff game since 1992. After 20 straight losing seasons, it has been an extraordinary year watching Andrew McCutchen stake his claim as the National League MVP, Pedro Alvarez tie for the league title in home runs, and the pitching staff seemingly always getting key outs. Unfortunately, one of the biggest Pirates fans I know, my cousin Bob, passed away Friday night.

I try not to write about my family much, but I'm making an exception today. My cousin Bob is actually my Mom's first cousin. Does that make us second cousins or first cousins, once removed? Regardless, Bob was the youngest of four brothers who spent much of his life in the small town where my mom grew up. He served in the Army around the end of World War II and graduated from the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania where he was fraternity brothers with future Pennsylvania Senator Arlen Specter.

Bob and his brothers owned and operated the family business which was an automotive repair shop that also sold auto equipment and sporting goods. I clearly remember visiting the store as a kid, particularly the distinct smell of new tires. I'm not sure that my cousins were big fans of my brother and I running around the store, though we mostly stayed in the sporting good section. I got at least one baseball glove at the store as well as a set of golf clubs that I still have today. I don't remember whether or not these were gifts, but if not, I'm sure that they were significantly discounted.

Anyway, Bob retired and moved to the Sarasota, Florida area where he golfed regularly and even picked up bocce. He was also a member of the Pittsburgh Pirates Booster Club, where he served as a volunteer security guard at Pirate City in Bradenton. As a result, he attended countless Pirates spring training games either while volunteering or by simply watching the games on his off days. Four years ago, Bob hosted me in Bradenton where we went to two Pirates game, and he showed me around Pirate City. It was an awesome trip! He really liked taking me around Bradenton and talking baseball. Sure, we talked about family and other stuff, but many conversations seemed to revolve around the Pirates. Even then, he liked McCutchen. For the amount of time he spent around the Pirates during the 20-season losing streak, he deserved to see the Pirates in the playoffs again. As illogical and unrealistic as it is, I'd like to think he knew the Pirates defeated the Reds on Friday night before passing away.

Bob was an extremely generous man, and he will be missed greatly. I feel bad that I hadn't talked with him recently or nearly as much as I should have over the past few years. Sure, life has been busier with the addition of a child, but I still should have talked to him significantly more than I did.

While I'll really excited about tonight's game, I'm sure there will be moments when I think of Bob.

Let's Go Bucs

Although I've followed the Pittsburgh Pirates as closely as ever, I've avoided writing this blog post for many weeks. After collapses in both 2011 and 2012, my fear is that the Pirates will collapse again as soon as I write about the team's success. Yes, this is completely irrational, and I know that my writing has no impact on Andrew McCutchen, Pedro Alvarez, Francisco Liriano, Mark Melancon and the rest of the team. Sean's Ramblings is no Sports Illustrated! However, I couldn't take it any more. I'm just too excited by this Pirates team. Take a look at the National League Central standings.

WOOOOOOO! It's August 1st, and the Pirates lead the division! Take a look at the overall record.

WOOOOOOO! It's August 1st, and the Pirates have the best record in baseball!

I'd like to think that I can still look at the Pirates objectively. While the pitching has been amazing, I'd still like to see a healthy Wandy Rodriguez and especially Jason Grilli for September and October. The team also needs another bat or two particularly someone who can play right field and potentially win a game as a pinch hitter.

In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the Pirates run. And if the Pirates don't make the playoffs, you can blame me for writing this post.

Be Cool Pirates Fans

I attended two Pittsburgh Pirates-Washington Nationals games this week at Nationals Park. Unlike going to Pirates games in DC since the Nats moved from Montreal, it felt different this year based on the team’s success. Wearing Pirates gear to a Nats game was an amazing experience over the past few days. We were there to celebrate the second best team in baseball, a team that looks like a legitimate playoff team. After 20 years of losing seasons, we bonded over Gerrit Cole, Pedro Alvarez, Francisco Liriano, Josh Harrison (yes, Josh Harrison) and the rest of the Pirates. However, some Pirates fans took things a little too far.

During Thursday’s game, a Pirates fan a few rows in front of me in the left field stands was being quite obnoxious in the finals innings. He may have had one beer too many, but that’s not really an excuse. In the 8th inning, the guy yelled to Bryce Harper that that the star Nationals outfielder effing sucks. He did not yell effing. We’ll set aside the fact that Harper does not suck. Every Pirates fan would love Harper in Pittsburgh, especially if the team could trade Travis Snider and Jose Tabata for him. (Please excuse me as I dream of a Marte-McCutchen-Harper outfield. Okay, I’m back) Being that this was an afternoon game with kids around, this didn’t go over well. Although a few Nats fans didn’t take too kindly to the comment and confronted him, I never heard any insults or threats. They simply told him to knock it off. As the inning continued, the guy started insulting the Nats and pointing out how far back the Nats are behind the Pirates in the Wild Card race. Some of his friends talked him down and tried to make peace and things were somewhat civil through the rest of the game (though they guy rubbed it in a little when the Pirates tied the game in the top of the 9th; he wasn’t there for Harper’s walk-off home run in the bottom of the 9th).

One of the Nats fans who confronted the guy is a friend of a friend. She is a Nats season ticket-holder who I just met at the game, and I apologized letting her know that the guy does not represent Pirates fans. She appreciated the gesture and indicated that I’ve been the only nice Pirates fan sitting near her during the series. While I found there to be plenty of nice Pirates fans at the games on Tuesday and Thursday, I’m sure there were a few Pirates fans that were not as nice. Therefore, this message is for all Pirates fans attending away games, sitting near opposing fans at PNC Park or even talking with friends, coworkers or random folks at bars that are fans of other National League teams. Being enthusiastic about the Pirates is expected. It’s been a long 20 years. Share your happiness and feel free discuss Cutch’s greatness. Explain your concerns about Jason Grilli’s injury and the bench. Just keep it clean in front of kids and don’t disparage the opposing team.

Let’s Go Bucs!

Random Questions

What actor, who has never been nominated for an Academy Award, has the highest grossing films? In case this isn't clear, let's take Will Smith for example. His films (Men in Black, Independence Day, Bad Boys, etc.) have grossed approximately $900 trillion dollars. Of course, Smith got an Oscar nomination for Ali, so he's out of the competition. I have no idea of the answer to this question, but I have some ideas.

What is the top seed in girl scout cookies?

Is there a better lollipop than Blow Pops?

Why is Tuesday always the worst day for mail?

Do they have Long John Silver's restaurants in any upscale neighborhoods? For example, do they have a LJS in Beverly Hills?

Will you watch The Office's finale on Thursday night?

Despite the Pirates extra inning win last night on a Cutch walk off home run, the Pirates are 13-209 against the Brewers since the Randall Simon incident. (This record may not be accurate.) It's the Sausage Curse! The only way to break the curse is for Ryan Braun to take out Cheese Chester. How can we get this to happen?

I guess you could consider this a Trivia Wednesday. Leave your answers in the comments section below.

Kripke Vs. Slash

I'm sure that many famous people read this blog. While I can't prove that President Obama, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey, David Cameron or Andrew McCutchen read Sean's Ramblings, they probably do. With that written, it's already documented that former Pittsburgh Steelers QB Kordell Stewart read this blog. Now, I have proof that Big Bang Theory actor John Ross Bowie read Sean's Ramblings.

@seansramblings knew about Feldman, did not know about Jordan. Cool!

— JohnRossBowie (@JohnRossBowie) April 12, 2013

@johnrossbowie Thanks for the reply. Go Bombers!

— Sean's Ramblings (@seansramblings) April 12, 2013

So just for fun, of these two, who is the most famous person to admit to reading Sean's Ramblings?

Kordell Stewart

- 11-year NFL career
- 2001 Pro Bowl QB
- Formerly married to a Real Housewife of Atlanta
- Co-host of Atlanta radio station 92.9 The Game's Gametime with Dukes, Slash & Rachel
- University of Colorado graduate and part of one of the most memorable plays in college football history

John Ross Bowie

- Plays Barry Kripke on The Big Bang Theory, the top-rated American comedy and the most-watched entertainment television show in Canada
- Member of Naked Babies sketch comedy troupe.
- Appeared in The League, Happy Endings, Bones, Childrens Hospital, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Family Guy, Monk, Heroes and Arrested Development.
- Has a Tumblr Page
- Ithaca College graduate

So who is more famous: Kordell Stewart or John Ross Bowie? More importantly, will either or both of these individuals allow me to interview them for a future blog post?

Links, Links & Links (2200)

Welcome to the 2200th post here at Sean's Ramblings. Not too shabby from my humble beginnings to where I am now (which is basically the same place).

Great profile of Andrew McCutchen. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]

Read this article from my friend Rabbi Rachel Kobrin about gay marriage. Completely unrelated to this article, she is probably the only Rabbi I know that used to regularly watch The Ricki Lake Show. [Huffington Post]

Although I don't have the time, resources or access, I would love for Sean's Ramblings to be like the DC Sports Bog someday. Here are several recent highly entertaining posts:

- President Taft's great-grandson with the Washington Nationals Racing Taft. Your move Lincoln descendants. [DC Sports Bog]
- This guy won't shave until one of the four major DC sports teams wins a championship. [DC Sports Bog]
- An interview with Verne Lundquist & Bill Raftery. [DC Sports Bog]
- Racing President Teddy helps a guy propose at a Nats game. [You guessed it: DC Sports Bog]

I love this picture from Deadspin.

Congrats to Mr. Brame on getting published. [Mr. Brame's Blog]

I never get tired of Mister Rogers stories. [Uproxx via That's Church]

Uncovering myths from a police officer [Ngewo's World]

Finally, in memory of Roger Ebert, I really enjoyed him and Gene Siskel walking around a New Jersey neighborhood on Letterman.

Tuesday Videos & A Message From Andrew McCutchen

This video might look like a normal relay race as part of the halftime activities of this weekend's Southampton-Newcastle game, but stay to the end if you like laughing at the misfortunes of others.



This actually reminded me of a Pittsburgh Penguins game I attended years ago where they had people in sumo suits play hockey on ice between periods. I think I fell out of my seat laughing so hard.

(h/t Deadspin)

While this is an absolutely incredible goal by Zlatan Ibrahimovic of Sweden against England, why include music when listening to the announcers and crowd should be enough.



h/t Dejan Kovacevic

Finally, Pittsburgh Pirates OF Andrew McCutchen is excited that Mr. Brame (a friend of Sean's Ramblings) found his wife's car keys. Please take 45 seconds to read the story and hear McCutchen's message.

A Message To The Pittsburgh Pirates & Hal Sparks

Dear Pittsburgh Pirates – Call Hal Sparks, invite him to a game and have him address the crowd.

Dear Hal Sparks – Accept the invitation and become a Pittsburgh celebrity.

With a 2-0 victory over the Houston Astros last night, the Pittsburgh Pirates are 10 games over .500 for the first time since 1992. Now, just past the half-way point of the baseball season, the Pirates are in first place in the National League Central division and have the second best record in the National League. So what’s the secret of the Pirates success? The MVP performance of Andrew McCutchen? The outstanding performance of the pitching staff including All-Star Joel Hanrahan and should be All-Stars James McDonald and A.J. Burnett? The hot bat of Pedro Alvarez? The answer is Zoltan and the “Z” from the legendary, Oscar-Award winning 2000 movie Dude, Where’s My Car?



As the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette article (and video) explains,

"It all started in Atlanta when we were watching [television] in the clubhouse, and there was nothing we wanted to watch," said second baseman Neil Walker, recalling the last weekend in April. "We saw 'Dude, Where's My Car?' And guys were like 'Oh, we haven't seen this in a while.' So we watched it.

"It was just so terrible and stupid. We just pulled that from it. It's just kind of our team way of bonding, I guess."

As the Pirates have continued to win, Zoltan fever has continued to spread across Pittsburgh. Therefore, I recommend that the Pirates reach out to Hal Sparks, the actor who portrayed Zoltan, and ask him to give the Zoltan speech followed by a “Let’s Go Bucs” prior to an August or September home game. The crowd will go crazy! Don’t believe me? Several years ago, the Steelers started playing the song Renegade to pump up the crowd. Today, the city goes nuts whenever Styx comes to town to perform this song.

I bet you’re also wondering why such a big star like Hal Sparks would ever consider this opportunity. He’s probably extremely busy preparing for the next season of Disney’s TV show Lab Rats or the next VH1 I Love the 80s, 90s, 2000s, or 2010s show. However, this type of publicity is just the spark that Sparks needs to, um, spark his career!

Of course, Sparks is from Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky, so if he’s a Reds fan and doesn’t want to support the Pirates, I understand. Then again, being a celebrity is nice.

Let’s Go Bucs! Zoltan!

Pittsburgh Pirates Predictions & Props

(For those of you that generally read my blog through Google Reader or another feed, I'm sorry that you saw an "odd" post with only the odds earlier today. That's what happens when you try to write a blog post immediately after arriving home from a Van Halen/Kool & The Gang concert - more on this later.)

With the 2012 baseball season only days away (not including the Seattle-Oakland games in Japan), I need to start working on a draft plan for my fantasy baseball league. I also decided that now is the time to make predictions for the Pittsburgh Pirates season. While the odds for the Pirates winning the National League Central division (30/1), NL Pennant (40/1) and World Series (100/1) are fairly poor, I thought it would be fun to explore the prop bets for the team and individual players and share my predictions.

1. Over/under wins: 72.5

I'll go over. It's March, so of course I'm optimistic now.

2. Andrew McCutchen batting average in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under .280

I'll go over on this one too. I think McCutchen will have an amazing season.

3. Andrew McCutchen - Total HR's in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 25.5

While I do think McCutchen will have an amazing season, I think 20-25 home runs is realistic.

4. Andrew McCutchen - Total Stolen Bases in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 25.5

Over.

5. Neil Walker - BA in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under .275

I'll go under on this one. No real reason why.

6. Pedro Alvarez - Total HR's in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 17.5

The big money deserves to go on the under, but I'm one of the few remaining Pedro supporters. I'll go over.

7. Garrett Jones - Total HR's in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 15.5

I'll go under only because I'm banking on Pedro playing well meaning less playing time for Jones with McGahee getting significant at-bats at 1st.

8. Jose Tabata - BA in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under .280

Over. I think Tabata will hit around .300.

9. Joel Hanrahan - Total Saves in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 35.5

Under. There will be fewer save opportunities for Hanrahan since the Pirates will constantly win games 10-2!

10. Erik Bedard - Total Wins in the 2012 Regular Season: Over/Under 8

Over. I predict more wins for Bedard in 2012 than Correia in 2011.

Shockingly, there were no prop bets for Clint Barmes. I also propose my own prop bets.

11. Josh Harrison walks: Over/Under 9

This is the toughest prop on the board! I'll predict under, but barely.

12. Team bunting attempts: Over/Under 1000

Over, but I'm not going to actually count this during the season.

Feel free to leave your predictions in the comments section below, and we'll revisit this in October. The first 10 props are courtesy of Bovada, an online gambling website (as opposed to an offline gambling website).

Pittsburgh Pirates Sign Rambo

After a 22-year absence from the organization, the Pittsburgh Pirates resigned outfielder Mike Diaz to a two-year, $4.25 million deal. Although I’m concerned about Diaz’s age and the fact that he hasn’t played in 20+ years, I’m excited that “Rambo” is back! Either my brother or I (or both of us) had a “Rambo” poster where instead of Stallone and guns, the picture was of Mike Diaz and baseballs. It was awesome, but sadly, I can’t find a picture online. I hope they create a 2010 version.



I’m sorry. I just learned that the Pirates actually signed Matt Diaz (pronounced Dye-As) formerly of the Atlanta Braves. I am less excited since he seems to pronounce his name incorrectly. However, if we all agree to call the new Diaz, Rambo, Rambo II or Rambo Jr., I think I’ll be okay with this. There’s more about this signing in the Post-Gazette.


Since I’m already on the subject of the Pirates, let’s look back at some predictions for the 2010 season made back in April. Our experts were Matt of Pittsburgh Lumber Co., Brad of This is Getting Old, Captain Easychord of Corsairs Affairs. Rob of my fantasy baseball league and me.

Andrew McCutchen’s stats (batting average, HRs, RBIs, stolen bases)
Actual: .286, 16 HRs, 56 RBIs, 33 SBs. I’ll give Captain the edge here with his prediction of .277/13/63/33

What current player will be traded before the end of the season?Captain and Rob both predicted Dotel. Rob also guessed Church. No credit given for the guesses of Iwamura and Donnelly.

Who will lead the team in wins?
Matt, Rob & I all correctly predicted Paul Maholm. Unfortunately, for us Maholm, and the Pirates, he only had 9 wins. Brad probably wants his pick of Charlie Morton stricken from the records.

Will John Russell get ejected during the season?
He actually got ejected twice. Matt was the only one of us to guess that this would happen, though he predicted only once.

Season prediction
The Bucs finished 57-105. Rob was closest with a guess of 65-97. The rest of us were way too optimistic in guessing 73 to 77 wins.

This will likely be my last Pittsburgh Pirates post in a while, unless the team signs someone named Matt LaValliere. I think we need another Spanky!

Washington Nationals Want You To Vote For Texas Rangers Player

I'm confused. (Yes, that doesn't take much.) I received an e-mail from the Washington Nationals today encouraging me to vote for Ryan Zimmerman (makes sense) and Michael Young of the Texas Rangers (huh?) for the 2010 All-Star game.



According to the e-mail, "Last is certainly not least in the 2010 All-Star Game Final Vote Sponsored by Sprint. Vote often for the LAST players on the ballot, Ryan Zimmerman and Michael Young. Save the best for last and help Ryan and Michael get to the All-Star Game!"

Again, I'm confused. Apparently, we're not voting for our own team's players, we're now voting based on who is in your homeroom!

Perhaps the Nationals want you to vote for Michael Young since the Rangers originated in Washington as the Washington Senators. Granted, the Senators moved to Texas after the 1972 season, which is before Young was born, so that seems like a stretch.

Regardless, I think I'll pass on voting for either and wait until baseball puts Andrew McCutchen or Stephen Strasburg on the ballot.

2010 Pittsburgh Pirates Predictions

The Pittsburgh Pirates season begins today so I thought I would ask Pirates experts their predictions of the 2010 season. Unfortunately, many of them did not reply. Therefore, you're stuck with this cast of characters:

Matt of Pittsburgh Lumber Co. Matt started blogging about the Pirates in 2006 (or during the Josh Sharpless era).

Brad of This is Getting Old. His e-mail address isn't yahoo.com or gmail.com; it is pittsburghpirates.net. That's dedication!

Captain Easychord of Corsairs Affairs. I'm not sure I can accurately share his Pirates credentials, but naming a blog Corsairs Affairs shows his commitment.

Rob of my fantasy baseball league. I've actually known Rob since 1st or 2nd grade and played against him in Little League baseball.

Sean of Sean's Ramblings (you don't need to click since you're already here). I once had a special shorts/T-shirts Pirates outfit that I got specifically to wear to Kennywood Day. I miss Kennywood Day!

1. Andrew McCutchen’s stats (batting average, HRs, RBIs, stolen bases)

Matt - McCutchen will go .292, 17 HR, 78 RBI, 28 SB.
Brad - Cutch will be solid again this year. I would still rather him bat lead-off but what do I know. My guess is .290, 11, 66, 25
Captain - Since I don't play roto/fantasy baseball anymore, I haven't really paid much attention to all the numbers anymore... so let's take what he did last year, reduce the rate stats because of sophomore slumps and because he played a little over his projection... then bump up the raw stats because of extra PT (assuming no injuries) with a few extra steals thrown in because he says he plans to run more this year....277/13/63/33

Rob - .268 13 68 31
Sean - .280, 20 HR, 70 RBIs, 24 SB.



2. What current player will be traded before the end of the season?

Matt - Zach Duke, especially if he has a good start to the season.
Brad - Ryan Doumit. Fingers crossed
Captain - One of the bullpen arms, in all likelihood... let's say octavio dotel...
Rob - Dotel, Iwamura, and Ryan Church
Sean – Brendan Donnelly

3. Who will lead the team in wins?

Matt- Paul Maholm, with 14.
Brad - Charlie Morton. After watching him last year I feel he can take huge strides.
Captain - ok, I'm going to be the stats curmudgeon here and say whatever starter gets the most run support... (see what I did there? it's all on you, offense!) ... but really, among the top four starters, they all look kinda similar-ish to me, at least in terms of results... so staying healthy and getting good run support will probably be the difference...

Rob - I would like to say someone will break 10 wins, I'm guessing Maholm
Sean – Since he’s on my fantasy team, I’ll go with Maholm with 13 wins.

4. Will John Russell get ejected during the season?

Matt - Yes, once.
Brad - I just don't see it.
Captain - John Russell won't get ejected from a game, but he'll get suspended for the season after bringing a gun to pnc park to threaten an assistant coach (Don Long? Carlos Garcia?) as a "joke"... no wait, that won't happen... nobody would be stupid enough to do *that*...

Rob - No, he'll be let go before he gets a chance
Sean – No. He got his one ejection out his system last season.



5. What promotional event would you like to see at PNC Park?

Matt - I have been saying it for years. Get a Pirate ship in the Allegheny River already.

Brad - I love bobbleheads so I'm good with the SGAs. I think with the 20 year anniversary of the successful early '90's teams we need Bonds, Bonilla, Van Slyke and Drabek bobbleheads. Just not a Belinda one.

Captain - Guaranteed winner night... everyone who buys a ticket to the game that night gets to see the pirates win, guaranteed... if it doesn't happen that night, fans in attendance get vouchers for a free ticket to a game of their choice... as long as the team keeps losing when any particular fan shows up, that fan's voucher can continue to be redeemed for a ticket to yet another game... these vouchers only expire when they're redeemed for tickets to a game that the pirates win... the pirates are known for their losing, and hey... wouldn't you go to the park if you got to see 'em win? besides, it's not like they're filling the seats as it is... plenty of spare capacity at most games (all games?)...

Rob - Disco Demolition night, Take your Dog to the game, or Tiger's Mistresses get in free night.

Sean – Turner Ward bobble fence night.



6. Season prediction (please include the team’s record and place in the standings) and any other thoughts.

Matt - 77-85, 4th place. The 100-loss predictions are misguided, as this team is better than the 2009 version. While the team is not quite to the point of relevancy, it will at least approach competency in 2010.

Brad - We're not there yet, but soon. The Bucs will finish in 5th, ahead of Houston. 74-88. Another losing season. Next year we shock the world!

Captain - 74-88, fifth place. I'm on board with what neal huntington is doing with the franchise... they're headed in the right direction even if it might not show up in the wins and losses this year or next...

Rob - 65 - 97, last place ; bright side they can make fun of [my fantasy team] who has a more pathetic roster

Sean – 73 wins. Fifth place ahead of Houston. .500 in 2011!


Please feel free to share your own predictions in the comments section. Yes, I'll come back to this in October to see how we did.

Photos of Cutch and Russell via Peter Diana/Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. I don't remember where I found the Turner Ward pic.

Randomness

A lot of thoughts pop into my head, and I'd like to share some of them with you. Alone, these thoughts probably make for a terrible blog post. Together, they hopefully make for a not as terrible blog post.

- Many restaurants sell boneless wings or chicken. Have you ever seen boneful wings or boneful chicken on a menu?

- According to the list of the most popular male baby names born in the U.S. in 2007, Sean finished #76 with 6,216. Jesus finished #77 with 6,203. Sean > Jesus!

- In Saturday's mail, we received not one, not two, but SIX grocery circulars for Safeway. Did the mail carrier have extras and just wanted to give us more or was Safeway's plan to give everyone multiple circulars?

- How many Bring It On movies have there been? There's a new one coming out on DVD this Tuesday. It seems like one or maybe even two would have been enough.

- Why are there massive wildfires in California every year?

- I follow the Pirates more than any other Pittsburgh sports team, but I write about them less than any other team. However, I'll try to make up for that by posting this amazing picture of Andrew McCutchen after hitting a game-winning home run last week.



You want more don't you? Well, how about a few links for your day:

- Art Rooney passed away twenty years ago. Behind the Steel Curtain has a nice tribute.

- Captain Easychord is quitting fantasy sports. Meanwhile, I'm preparing for my second, third and fourth fantasy football drafts. [Corsairs Affairs]

- Indiana University is moving its 2010 home game against Penn State from Bloomington, Indiana to FedEx Field just outside of Washington DC. That kind of takes away any type of home field advantage. [DCist]

- Look for a real-life R2D2 to be off the market if Steve won the MegaMillions on Friday. [Steve Is Alive]

Photo by Peter Diana/Post-Gazette