Thursday, January 29, 2009

Official Won’t-Be-In-On-Time Permission Slip

In celebration of the Pittsburgh Steelers appearance in Super Bowl XLIII, I hereby request permission to report late for work on Monday, February 2, 2009.* I plan to join the entire southwestern Pennsylvania region (aka Sixburgh) and Steelers fans around the world and participate in the following activities on Super Bowl Sunday:

 Shop for appropriate Steelers attire to wear all day and night of Super Bowl Sunday

 Stop by the nearest supermarket to stock up on all the Steelers essentials (chipped chopped ham, jumbo, etc.)

 Listen to "The Pittsburgh Steelers Polka" or other Steelers odes on the radio.

 Tune into the pre-game TV broadcasts and laugh at the stories showing the dirty, smoky city of yesteryear, knowing that Pittsburgh just doesn’t look like that anymore.

 Wave the Terrible Towel throughout the Super Bowl player introductions or until my arm gets tired.

 Chant "Here We Go Steelers, Here We Go" non-stop during the game

 Consume large quantities of pierogies, kielbasa, any Heinz product and, of course, Iron City.

All of these things will tire me out and make it necessary for me to come in late on Monday. Boss, I appreciate your cooperation in this important matter and sincerely thank you for your understanding that my heart belongs to "Sixburgh."


(Insert name here)

* Even if you're not a Steelers fan, you can use the excuse that Monday is Groundhog Day.

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