Monday, August 20, 2007

Jenna Bush Wedding Plans

You probably heard the recent news that Jenna Bush got engaged to University of Virginia graduate student Henry Hager. For no apparent reason, I thought it would be fun to see how the wedding planning is going:

Laura Bush: For an event this big, we need a wedding planner who can coordinate so many aspects of the big day while making sure that this stays a private affair.

President George Bush: I know the perfect person, Karl Rove. Now that he’s resigned, I know he is looking for something to do. He is the architect, so he can put together a great wedding at a decent cost.

Jenna Bush: That’s fine as long as he doesn’t dance or try to rap at the reception.

Laura: I’ll talk to him, honey. We really need to discuss the guest list. Do we need to invite ALL of these world leaders?

George: Well, Tony Blair is a must. He was fantastic in The Simpsons episode a few years ago.

Laura: I agree, but since he’s not the Prime Minister anymore, do we also have to invite Gordon Brown?

George: Yeah, I guess so, but he’s not as much fun as Nicolas Sarkozy. I really had a great time with him in New Hampshire, and I can’t wait to ride our bikes together in France.

Jenna: He was so cute on the boat too.

Laura: Do we also need to invite Jacques Chirac? You did work together for over six years.

George: Let’s put him on the list for now, but if we need to make cuts later, he’s the first to go.

Jenna: Can we invite Colin Powell? He was always so nice to me.

George: Well, we haven’t talked in three years, so he’s a no for now. Rummy is a must, and so is Paul Wolfowitz, even though that World Bank gig didn’t really work out for him.

Jenna: We can’t invite Wolfowitz. He’s weird!

George: I’m the deciderer! Wolfowitz gets invited.

Laura: Jenna, we can put him in the table in the back corner. You won’t even see him.

Jenna: Fine. Daddy, to celebrate the engagement, Dick [Cheney] wants to take Henry out quail hunting. I don’t want Henry to go with him.

George: I’ll see what I can do. I wonder if we can get a government contract for Halliburton to arrange the flowers. That could solve the problem.

This discussion will probably continue for the next few months. I wonder if President Bush can get arrange for Jenna to get first dibs at Filene Basement’s Running of the Brides.


Anonymous said...

us uva guys know how to get by in life.

Nick said...


Sean said...

Nick - I'm gladed you enjoyed it.

Jason - If only it was James Farrior,Health Miller or one of the Barber twins! (I just figured I would throw out names of other famous UVA guys.)

WizCoder said...