Trip to the Dentist

I am probably one of the few people who enjoys going to the dentist. You see, my dentist gave me an electric toothbrush as a wedding gift, and she never mentions the fact that I don’t floss.* Even though I’ve moved to another part of the Washington DC area, I am loyal to my dentist and drive nearly 25 miles each way for the appointment.

Over the years, I have got to know the office receptionist and the dental hygienists. I have had one hygienist in particular during my last few appointments, and we generally have a good relationship in which we joke with each other. During my most recent appointment on Monday, I innocently asked her if she had traveled anywhere and basically what was new. After a fairly long pause, she shared that she and her boyfriend broke up. Ouch. My witty response: “Well, that is new.”

She chuckled slightly and continued to scrape my teeth with the metal instrument. I wasn’t sure how to respond to this but during the next break, I asked if it was mutual. Nope. The scraping continued. How long were you dating? Four years. Dagger. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to have a metal instrument in my mouth.** I was digging myself into a bigger hole and was happy not to be able to ask further questions. For example, would it have been inappropriate to mention that I have some single guy friends?

Anyway, I also learned that she wanted to get married and he did not; if she had to tell one more person that she got dumped, she was going to vomit; and that she wasn’t able to sleep all weekend. Now I start to worry about the scraping instrument near my tongue and gums. During the next break, I manage to change the topic to soccer refereeing and annoying soccer parents and coaches. Good times!

Oh, and no cavities!


* I’m going to use lacochran’s footnotes again. While there’s a high probability that Oral-B sent my dentist the toothbrush for free, she didn’t have to give it to me as a gift. How many dentists do you know that give their patients gifts? The mini tube of toothpaste doesn’t count!

** This sentence sounds wrong.